Paris, Nicole & Lindsay Driving School

Automakers teach driving skills for the wacked out
Inebriated Press
August 7, 2007
Automakers Ferrari and Volvo have announced driving schools for drunken and drugged up young people designed to help them have fun while avoiding death.  The American Automobile Association (AAA) is wary of the approach but Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) backs the effort.
“There are ways to avoid [...]

Chinese Satellites to Ensure Safe Food at 2008 Olympics

Space lasers to zap bacteria and other ‘threats’
Inebriated Press
August 7, 2007
China announced on Monday that it will use satellites to ensure food safety at the 2008 Beijing Olympics by ‘firing lasers at offending bacteria’ that threaten good hygiene or Chinese gold medals.  This has U.S. athletes pondering the recent use of the term ‘bacteria’ in the [...]