Fear of Canadian Socks Drives U.S. Plan

Foot fetish generates sock safeguard
Inebriated Press
August 23, 2007
Stung by criticism that the U.S. is playing fast and loose with food safety by only inspecting one percent of all the food it imports, the federal government has unveiled a sock safeguard plan to block Canadian socks by placing high tariffs on them.  Lloyd Wood an executive [...]

CIA Report Depicts Pre 9-11 Errors

Agency lacked gum balls to do job adequately
Inebriated Press
August 23, 2007
A report released Tuesday by the Central Intelligence Agency (CIA) includes new details of the agency’s missteps before the Sept. 11 attacks.  The Report outlined how agents watched for Arab terrorists in World Wrestling Federation (WWF) matches, looked for gum balls and ate nuts while [...]