Ripping CD’s for own use is illegal says industry lawyer

Just send money to music companies and listen to the radio

Inebriated Press
January 3, 2008

A federal lawsuit filed in Arizona alleges that it’s illegal for buyers of music CD’s to rip songs for personal use onto their own computer or iPod even if it’s never shared with anyone else.  That’s according to the filing made by a lawyer for the Recording Industry Association of America (RIAA).  RIAA says any copying of a CD is unauthorized and is therefore illegal.  RIAA executives are expected to petition the U.S. Congress to have the I.R.S. collect money from American’s to support the music industry and then only allow citizens to listen to the radio for entertainment.

“These personal music devises have gotten out of hand.  It’s time to return to the old days of radio except we still want money.  Since we own all the rights to music, no one else has a right to use it even if they pay to buy it from us,” said RIAA CEO Mitch Bainwol, slapping a small child for switching from one copywrited song to another too quickly.  “It’s our right to control how music is listened to, who hears it and how they manage it.  We put lots of fine print on stuff and that guarantees us control.  Buyers of things shouldn’t assume they have any right to use anything that they purchase.  In fact American’s are pretty screwed up over the whole concept of ownership and individual rights and we believe this lawsuit will help straighten them out.”

Not everyone agrees with the RIAA and some people feel that the exchange of money for a product or service still constitutes the purchase of the right to use it.  “If you buy something from someone, you own it and can do whatever you want to with it,” said Izzy Smallorwhat, a radical ownership activist who has been buying things and using them for years.  “If the RIAA wants to keep music to themselves, then they shouldn’t be selling it.  I have the right to use what I buy.  That’s the nature of the marketplace as it extends through history from the days of bartering right up and through the creation of the Chinese knock-off.  Trade and ownership are the foundation of the world’s economy.”

RIAA, the Big Four record companies’ lobbying arm and primary legal weapon, considers the copying of songs from your own CDs to your own computer, for your own personal use, to be just as illegal as posting them online for all to share, according to the federal lawsuit.  On page 15 of a supplemental brief responding to the judge’s technical questions about the case, the RIAA’s Phoenix lawyer, Ira M. Schwartz, states that the defendant is liable simply for the act of creating “unauthorized copies” — by ripping songs from CDs.  According to this logic, every single person who’s ever “ripped” a CD for portable listening on an iPod or other MP3 player could be liable for astronomical damages.

In other news, CNN reported yesterday that bad foods like red meat are actually good for you because of something recently discovered called “protein”.  The report said protein can provide nourishment.  No word on whether supermarkets will allow you to use it if you buy it.

 (C) 2008

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