Election Pride: black beats white, left beats right

Michelle Obama beaming bright

Inebriated Press \ Division of Rant (with pretzels)
February 25, 2008

On two separate occasions last week Michelle Obama, wife of presidential candidate Barack Obama, said that for the first time in her adult life, she was proud of America.  Citing her husbands success in beating back Hillary Clinton’s campaign for president, Michelle waxed lyrical espousing hope and change as Democrat voters began selecting Barack over Hillary.  Hope and change as defined by the Obama for President campaign means abandoning Iraq, and taxing wealthy and middle class Americans to fund national health care and a national program to provide houses for lower income people; also, signing on to the U.N. plan to eliminate handguns from Americans and provide hundreds of millions of dollars to the U.N. for social programs, above what the U.S. already provides.  Debate over pride, left wing values and the reallocation of wealth inside America and to the world community as directed by the United Nation’s socialists and dictators continues.

“I was not saying that I was proud that Americans are supporting a black over a white for president,” said Michelle Obama, burning an American flag because she is free to do so, because others died for her rights.  “What I meant was that the time for far left liberal philosophy, yes even more left than Teddy Kennedy, is what Americans are finally getting behind; and I’m proud of America for that.  Nothing that the U.S. has ever done compares to this as we become a nation in the mould of France.  In fact, in the history of this country, nothing will come close to the reallocation of individuals’ wealth and the restructuring of the U.S. military that Barack and I will initiate with the help of the Democrat controlled U.S. House and Senate.  And Americans are finally getting behind the effort to reallocate their money and they finally understand that Berkeley values that stand against the U.S. military and in favor of anti-Iraq groups like Code Pink, are what we all stand for.  I have never been proud of America in my life.  But I am now.”

Despite the trends in the Democrat Party to move to the far left, not all Americans are signing on.  “Oh I don’t know if becoming socialist-pacifists like the French is what most Americans are really into,” said General George Patton, a decorated war hero whose exploits helped the country defeat Nazi Germany and free Western Europe, including France.  “Americans have been willing to fight for their freedom and the freedom of others throughout our history.  We believe in providing individual opportunity and will lend a hand to people inside and outside this country to enable them to help themselves.  That’s what America is all about.  The idea that there are enough Americans willing to subjugate their money and freedom to the federal government with the thought that bureaucrats can better run the lives of free citizens seems shaky to me.  Then there’s the question of whether it’s a good idea to elect a guy who voted to avoid defending the country when the intelligence at the time said a foreign nation had nuclear and biological agents available to terrorists who had already attacked the nation on 9-11.  I may have died in 1945 but this kind of shit doesn’t sit well with me.”

Michelle Obama proclaimed last week that for “the first time” in her adult life,” she was proud of America, as she spoke during two rallies in Wisconsin to support her husband’s presidential bid.  “Hope is making a comeback and, let me tell you, for the first time in my adult life, I am proud of my country.  Not just because Barack is doing well, but I think people are hungry for change,” she said during a rally in downtown Milwaukee.  Change for the sake of change, built on the concept of hope, has been the fundamental theme of the Obama campaign.  That and the reallocation of wealth and restructuring of the U.S. military.

Yet, it would appear that even critics of the U.S. could scarcely deny that there have been real causes for American pride in the past 25 years prior to some Democrat’s Obama orgasm: the fall of the Berlin Wall; the victory in the first Gulf War in 1991; the nation’s unity in grief and resolve after September 11.  Most Americans probably even got a small buzz of patriotic pride when they heard that one of our multimillion-dollar missiles had shot a dead but dangerous satellite travelling at 17,000 miles per hour out of the sky so that it fell harmlessly to Earth.  But not, apparently, Michelle Obama, wife of the man who is now the putative Democratic candidate for U.S. president, and at this point favorite to succeed to that job. 

“The American people have been confused for a long time, all caught up with lifting themselves up by the boot straps and making something of themselves,” said Ms. Obama, weaving a tapestry of meaningless syllables against a sky shining bright with an eclipse, much like the underlying foundation on which the Obama campaign is built.  “That’s the old worn out thinking of a bygone era and has no place in a future built on the backs of yesterdays hard working American’s and a military that has made more people free in the history of humankind than any country in recorded history.  Our bright new vision is to take what we have and build on it by tearing it down and redistributing it to the world’s poor; and ushering in a new era of peace by giving in to everyone with an alternative point of view.  Just think of it, Barack as president and Nancy Pelosi leading the House and Harry Reid the Senate.  Finally, real American left wing values will lead this country.  Everyone in the world will be proud of America after four years of the Obama Administration.  It’s the new America and it’ll be here just as soon as we get rid of the old white Republican candidate and the old white woman Democrat.  Now you understand what I’m really proud about.”

In related news, most media outlets continue to characterize the 2008 U.S. presidential election as being one about momentum and fresh excitement.  No word on whether actual issues and the impact of the candidates’ positions on our nation and its future will become important at anytime in the future.

(C) 2008 InebriatedPress.com

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