Drug Use Rights, Cow Brains and Test Tube Meat

Freedom and Rules, Life and Death

Inebriated Press
June 6, 2008

The Canadian newspaper, Globe and Mail, reported this week that a judge in British Columbia ruled that Vancouver’s safe-injection site – where drug addicts can shoot up while government health workers watch – is legal. And TheCattleSite News Desk reported that Australian officials have issued a call for cow brains so they can test them and prove the county has no Mad Cow Disease. Meanwhile Environmental Magazine reports that scientists are growing animal muscle in test tubes. Debate over what humans and animals should be protected from, and what constitutes freedom, is debated around the world.

“I should be free to take drugs and eat cows, or not, whichever I want, and no person or government should stand in my way. I am an independent entity and choose the level of dependence and control that I accept in my life,” said Stacy Freeborn, a lithe red head with sufficient intelligence, muscle tone and bust size to be considered above average in all areas. “Well meaning people try to control whether and how people do drugs and try to create fake meat in test tubes. Others try to cut the odds of mad cow disease by arbitrary testing of brains collected by volunteers. I say, if you’re born to be hung you won’t be shot. Let us do what we want and take our chances. Each step toward ‘protection’ results in power shifting away from the person ‘protected’ and puts it in the hands of the protector. I’ve known guys who have ‘protected’ their women to death. Government should turn us loose, keep us informed, protect our freedoms and our lives from murderers, but not keep us from doing whatever we want.”

Some people think that governments and activists have a good understanding of what people need and that when they take action to put more protective measures in place it’s for our own good. “You take away signal lights at an intersection and good people die. You let people take whatever drugs they want and good people die. You start producing meat in a test tube and … well, I won’t like it,” said Ziggy Long, busily duct taping a boy scout to a stop sign for his protection. “It takes rule of law vigorously enforced to establish a civil society and provide for the growth and development of culture and civilization. I suppose some may say that Nazi Germany passed the point where rules provided a healthy platform for freedom and civil society, but there are down sides to everything. You have to admire their high degree of organization though.”

The Globe and Mail reported that last week, a B.C. judge ruled that Vancouver’s safe-injection site – where drug addicts can shoot up under the watchful eye of government health workers – is legal. The federal government, he said, has no right to end the temporary exemption that allows the site to operate. But Mr. Justice Ian Pitfield did a whole lot more than that. He created a constitutional right for addicts to shoot up. First, he defined the program as health care – on the grounds that addicts have a disease, and need their fix, just as diabetics need theirs. He went on to rule that denial of health care is a violation of Section 7 of the Charter of Rights and Freedoms, which says: “Everyone has the right to life, liberty and security of the person and the right not to be deprived thereof except in accordance with the principles of fundamental justice.” The decision has stirred heated debate.

TheCattleSite News Desk reported that Australia remains free of mad cow disease (Bovine Spongiform Encephalopathy) but needs to prove this every year by conducting regular national surveillance to a standard set by the World Organisation for Animal Health, the OIE. Biosecurity Queensland put out the call to local livestock producers and vets to urgently get in contact with the DPI&F if they have cattle and sheep showing nervous disorders and are willing to submit brain samples. Over 1,500 Queensland cattle and 300 Queensland sheep have tested negative since the national surveillance program began in 1998. Australia produced hundreds of thousands of livestock for food during that time.

Environmental Magazine reported that scientists are already growing animal muscle by performing a biopsy of stem cells from a livestock animal and placing them in a nutrient-rich culture. In that medium, the cells divide and multiply. Cells are then attached to a scaffolding structure and placed in a bioreactor to grow. Some organizations maintain that less cows, pigs and chickens could mean a lower production of methane, one of the most potent greenhouse gases. The Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) stated that livestock are the largest source of methane from human-related activities. Scientists say that lab produced ‘meat’ faces some significant hurdles. Some experts say fake is always better.

“Some of the best relationships I’ve been in were all based on lies with women, who had huge silicon implants, and they were all mostly legal and we had a heck of a time. Artificial meat will be great too. I already know some women into the idea,” said Circus Freak, a retired acrobat who kept his professional name and some of his DNA. “You can’t fake death, but besides that you can pretty much fake anything else. And in most cases fake is better. I’m not saying it’s the only way to go, but it sure keeps things interesting. I like interesting.”

In other news, Globe and Mail reported that KFC is going vegan. After five years of protests, KFC Canada and People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals have cut a deal that will see the Canadian chain improve its chicken slaughter conditions and introduce vegan menu options. Yes, vegan chicken at KFC. The fake chicken, known as unchicken, has been around for years and is available in a handful of restaurants and stores in Canada. The article said PETA will continue to press KFC in the United States and elsewhere to change its slaughter practices – and sell unchicken, as 461 KFC Canadian chain stores have agreed to do. No word on whether the fake chicken is as good as the real thing, but ten out of ten women surveyed said real orgasms continue to be better than fake ones.

(C) 2008 InebriatedPress.com

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