Institutionalizing Chinese Muckrakers, Oprah at 200, and Assisted Suicide Television

> Trouble-making Chinese citizens are dispatched to mental institutions
> Oprah Winfrey says she weighs 200 pounds
> Assisted suicide to be shown on television for first time

Inebriated Press
December 11, 2008

Ms. Fear of Working Out

Ms. Fear of Working Out

The New York Times reported Monday that Chinese officials have found a cost-effective way of dealing with whistle-blowers and other annoying citizens: ship them to the nearest psychiatric hospital for a two year stint and forcibly medicate them. And the Baker City Herald reported Tuesday that Oprah Winfrey says she has a “fear of working out” and has “fallen off the wagon” and gained 40 pounds, toping out at 200. Meanwhile the U.K. Telegraph reported yesterday, that British television is going to broadcast the death of a man committing assisted suicide at a Swiss euthanasia clinic.  Pundits are debating the societal benefits of drugging complainers, abandoning healthy diet and exercise, and made-for-TV death.

“We’re now living in an era where all things are relative and can be redefined every fifteen minutes.  That means that everything has entertainment possibilities, but dissent by citizens claiming common sense is no longer acceptable.  People who try to behave normally — in the 1980’s sense of the word — stress out and end up abandoning diet and exercise and balloon into walruses.  The smart people are flexible and use these times as opportunities for change — like Barack Obama,” said Missy Moore-Mayhem, a fashionable healthcare worker, whose rebuilt body and mind contain traces of her past, but is mostly modern, fresh and untouched by common-place reality. 

Ms. Moore-Mayhem

Ms. Moore-Mayhem

“What Barack does and says at any one moment often contradicts with what he’s done and said in the past — even as recent as last week.  This confuses old traditionalists, and even supporters like Oprah Winfrey.  It’s important that going forward everyone just trusts him to do whatever he wants at any one moment.  The idea that consistency has value is dead now. It’s one of the first things Barack is formally changing in America.  The Chinese understand this modern concept and have had to institutionalize people who don’t get it.  And the Brit’s are gaining an understanding by not fearing suicide, and are using the Swiss death-program for entertainment.  The U.S. is a bit backward, but with Obama leading the way we’re gaining on the enlightened Chinese Communists and Western Socialist Europeans by leaps and bounds.”

Not everyone sees it the way Moore-Mayhem does.  “Locking-up whistle-blowers in nut houses who were trying to do good, and forcing medication into them is wrong.  And it may be okay to debate the issue of assisted suicide, but filming it and presenting it on television for entertainment backed by sponsorship advertising is twisted — what do you sell, a new pistol that fits in your mouth comfortably or an oven that leaks gas on purpose,” asked Stacy Comb-Carmichael, an organic food store owner and alfalfa grower, who remains stuck on old-fashioned food and ethics.  “We have to fight for what we believe in and what we want.  We have to champion the Chinese dissidents and corporate whistle-blowers, we have to diet and exercise in an ongoing effort to stay strong and healthy, and we have to stop ‘reality television’ of all kinds because it’s the most twisted kind of ‘reality’ of all.  Fight to cure disease and don’t fight to kill and sensationalize those who want to bail out of the battle.  Life can be hard.  But it is still good if we’ll fight for the best of it.  Common sense is still alive.  We have to act like it and not sit around bemoaning the trends.  Edmund Burke said, ‘The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.’ Some of this stuff is evil and we’re not doing anything.”

Agent of Change

Agent of Change

The New York Times reported that local officials in Shandong Province have apparently found a cost-effective way to deal with gadflies, whistle-blowers and all manner of muckraking citizens who dare to challenge the authorities: dispatch them to the local psychiatric hospital. In an investigative report published Monday by a state-owned newspaper, public security officials in the city of Xintai in Shandong Province were said to have been institutionalizing residents who persist in their personal campaigns to expose corruption or the unfair seizure of their property. Some people said they were committed for up to two years, and several of those interviewed said they were forcibly medicated. The article, in The Beijing News, said most inmates were released after they agreed to give up their causes.

The Baker City Herald reported that an embarrassed Oprah Winfrey says she’s “fallen off the wagon” of healthy living and has ballooned to 200 pounds. In January’s “O” magazine, Winfrey, 54, details her recent struggles with an out-of-balance thyroid and how the condition made her develop “a fear of working out.” She says she’s gained 40 pounds since 2006, when she weighed 160. Winfrey’s weight and height put her body mass index at 31.8, which is obese, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. The CDC says people who are obese are at higher risk for chronic conditions such as high blood pressure, diabetes and high cholesterol.

Made for TV Suicide

Made for TV Suicide

The Telegraph reported that the final moments of a man suffering motor neurone disease who chose assisted suicide at a controversial Swiss euthanasia clinic are to be screened on British television for the first time. Craig Ewert, 59, a retired university professor, opted for assisted suicide rather than spend the rest of his life locked in a “living tomb.” The final moments of terminally ill patients have been broadcast on British television before, but never in the case of an assisted suicide. Television watchdogs expressed concern that the programme, Right to Die, which will be shown on Sky Real Lives, would promote euthanasia. 

Husband or lover?

Husband or lover?

In other news, a new study revealed that young women are more promiscuous than men.  The study of 2000 women in the UK, commissioned by More magazine, found that by the age of 21, women have had an average of nine sexual partners – two more than their male partner. It also found a quarter of young women have slept with more than 10 partners in the first five years since losing their virginity, compared with 20 per cent of young men. More than half of respondents said they were not in love with the person they lost their virginity to and only 32 per cent believed it was important to be in love with someone before they had sex with them. Of the women surveyed, 50 per cent admitted they had cheated on a partner and half of those had been unfaithful at least twice. Only 25 per cent said they had a partner who cheated on them. No word on how the Chinese or Oprah feel about this, but someone on the Obama Presidential Transition Team mumbled that all change is good change.

(C) 2008 InebriatedPress.com

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