Google Poised to Rule, Obama Poised to Dominate, and Robber’s Cash-Stash-Snatch Cache

> Google pursues agenda in D.C. using Obama connection
> Obama tells Republicans to bury Rush Limbaugh and “get along”
> Robbery defendant hid cash in her vagina

Inebriated Press
January 28, 2009

googleThe Los Angeles Times reported Saturday that after the inauguration took place in Washington D.C. last week, that Google Inc. officially became a political power player. And The New York Post reported that President Obama warned Republicans that they better stop listening to conservative radio talk show host Rush Limbaugh if they “want to get along.”  Meanwhile, West Virginia’s The Inter-Mountain paper reported that Randolph County investigating officer J.A. Burns recovered money from a robbers home, finding $21,060 “stashed in various places around the house,” including $1,690 concealed in Sarah Wallace’s vagina. Pundits are debating the growing power of Google, Obama and a cash-stash in today’s tricky economy.

Xaviera Hollander

Xaviera Hollander

“You can’t underestimate the power of cash in a down economy when it comes to landing deals, buying political power, or just crushing your enemies the way Obama is doing — although the power of a vagina to create wealth, families or just store money shouldn’t be underestimated either,” said Xaviera Hollander, a vaginal economist and former hooker.  “If I’m Google and I bought my way into Obama’s campaign and transition team, now that he’s in power you’re damn right I’m going to cash in.  Think of the power and influence of Obama 2.0 running on Google’s global infrastructure — for both Obama and Google. The combination of high tech media and communications, plus money and political power, is invincible.  You can screw less people and still do whatever you want.  It worked for me when I wrote for Penthouse.”

CIA Chief limbers up

CIA Chief limbers up

Not everyone thinks money, technology and vaginal awareness alone equals power.  “In the end you still have to make things work to be a successful executive or elected official.  Power, money, smooth talk and access to women’s vagina’s will only get you so far,” said Leon Panetta, former Chief of Staff to vagina-lover Bill Clinton, now power-lover Barack Obama’s Director of the CIA.  “Clinton only got off the hook for lying to a grand jury and having sex with interns in the Oval Office because the economy was in good shape.  People didn’t care who he banged or lied to as long as they could pay their bills and stash some money in their 401k’s.  Barack has to be careful with how fast he crushes his enemies like Rush Limbaugh while counting on Senate-leader Harry Reid to pull crafty legislation out of his ass, and House-leader Nancy Pelosi to pull budgetary dollars out of her vagina.  And even with me running the CIA I can only give Barack intel on his enemy’s, I can’t arrange mysterious deaths for all his enemies, some people could catch on and cause trouble.  This isn’t Putin’s Russia or the Clinton White House you know… not yet anyway.”

Obama 2.0 + Google = Orwell's 1984?

Obama 2.0 + Google = Orwell's 1984?

The Los Angeles Times reported that another inauguration took place in Washington this past week — Google Inc. officially became a political power player. In October, Google was only hours from being sued by the Justice Department as a Web-search monopolist. Today, less than three years after it made its first Washington hire, the Internet giant is poised to capitalize on its backing of President Obama and pursue its agenda in the nation’s capital. Google’s executives and employees overwhelmingly supported Obama’s candidacy, contributing more money than all but three companies or universities. Google Chief Executive Eric Schmidt campaigned for Obama and was one of four Googlers on his transition team. He is now likely to get his calls to the White House returned.

“Google is not just a benign corporate entity. It has a variety of special interests,” said Jeff Chester, the executive director of the Center for Digital Democracy, who has sparred with Google over data-privacy issues. “They’re in a great position to push their agenda through with the support of the president and the Democrats in Congress.” Competitors worry about Google’s close relationship with the Obama administration, said Bill Whalen, a research fellow at Stanford University’s Hoover Institution. White House officials did not respond to requests for comment.

090128-barack-powerThe New York Post reported that President Obama warned Republicans on Capitol Hill Friday that they need to quit listening to radio host Rush Limbaugh if they want to get along with Democrats and the new administration.  “You can’t just listen to Rush Limbaugh and get things done,” he told top GOP leaders, whom he had invited to the White House to discuss his nearly $1 trillion stimulus package. A White House official confirmed the comment. That wasn’t Obama’s only jab at Republicans Friday. In an exchange with Rep. Eric Cantor (R-Va.) about the proposal, the president shot back: “I won,” according to aides briefed on the meeting. 

The man who would change America

The man who would change America

The National Review reported that Rush Limbaugh responded to Obama’s comments by saying that Obama is attempting to marginalize him and isolate Republicans. Limbaugh said that Obama’s plan would buy votes for the Democrat Party, in the same way FDR’s New Deal established majority power for 50 years of Democrat rule, and it would also simultaneously seriously damage any hope of future tax cuts. He said Obama’s stimulus is aimed at re-establishing “eternal” power for the Democrat Party rather than stimulating the economy because anyone with a brain knows this is not how you stimulate the economy. Limbaugh said that if Obama can make him serve as a distraction, then there is that much less time spent debating the merits of the trillion dollar debacle.  Limbaugh reminded listeners that Obama was a student of Saul Alinsky while he was community organizing in Chicago. He said Rule 13 of Alinksy’s Rules for Radicals is: “Pick the target, freeze it, personalize it, and polarize it.”

West Virginia’s The Inter-Mountain paper reported that four defendants allegedly involved in the armed robbery of Mountain Valley Bank in Mill Creek in December will have their cases bound over to a grand jury. During his testimony, Randolph County Deputy J.A. Burns said he was dispatched to a hold-up alarm at Mountain Valley Bank in Mill Creek at 10:32 a.m. on Dec. 30. Burns said he arrived at the scene and began obtaining verbal statements from witnesses. Burns told the court that police officers later received a tip from a resident who had been listening to a scanner and heard that two suspects had been seen running into a house on Conrad Street in Mill Creek.

Cash stash snatch cache

Cash stash snatch cache

Burns said officers located several items at the residence including camouflage clothes, sunglasses, a loaded .32 caliber revolver, a tote bag and $21,060 in cash. He said 50 of the recovered bills were serial numbered “bait money” from the bank. He said the money was found stashed in various places around the house. He said Wallace also had $1,690 concealed in her vagina. During cross examination, Burns was asked if he had performed a cavity search of Wallace. He said no, that she had told him where she hid the money. 

The Chicago Way – An Early Adopter

The Chicago Way – An Early Adopter

In other news, WKMG Orlando reported Saturday that a Boston terrier stopped a rape attempt in Pompano Beach, sheriff’s deputies said. The Broward County Sheriff’s Office said a 46-year-old woman allowed a man inside her apartment Wednesday after he said he was a repairman. Once inside, however, the man attacked her. Her female dog then bit the man on the shoulder, and he fled the apartment, according to the sheriff’s office. No word on whether the man was really looking for vaginal cash or attempting to Google for influence, but the fact is the Boston terrier won. 

And winning is what matters. 

That’s why during the disagreement between Obama and Rep. Eric Cantor (R-Va.) over Obama’s trillion dollar proposal, the president shot back his election reminder: “I won.”  That’s the Chicago way.  Get used to it.

(C) 2009 InebriatedPress.com

Source documents:

Google ready to pursue its agenda in Washington
http://www.latimes.com/news/nationworld/nation/la-fi-google24-2009jan24,0,5255660.story

PREZ ZINGS GOP FOE IN A $TIMULATING TALK
http://www.nypost.com/seven/01232009/news/politics/prez_zings_gop_foe_in_a_timulating_talk_151572.htm

Robbery suspects’ cases go to grand jury
http://theintermountain.com/page/content.detail/id/514551.html

Xaviera Hollander – From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Xaviera_Hollander

Limbaugh Responds to Obama
http://corner.nationalreview.com/post/?q=OTU5MjE3MmQ0NWU1Zjc1YzYyMDE1NzNmZmM2MzYxMmI

Sheriff: Dog Stopped Rape Attempt
http://www.clickorlando.com/news/18555514/detail.html

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