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Home Grown US Terrorism, Breastfeeding Boosts GPA, and Most American’s are Conservatives

> American-born Islamic murderer spikes fear of more
> Breastfeeding leads to higher grade point average and college attendance
> Gallup poll: 40% of Americans are conservative, 35% moderate, 21% liberal

Inebriated Press
June 17, 2009

Harvesting higher IQ's and better GPA's

Harvesting higher IQ's and better GPA's

Associated Press reported Monday that an American-born Tennessee youth who became an Islamic extremist and then murdered U.S. Army recruiter Pvt. William Andrew Long on June 1 while he stood outside his Arkansas office smoking a cigarette, is sparking fears that there may be more.  And United Press International reported Monday that a new study shows that breastfeeding is associated with an increase in high school grade point average, and an increase in odds of attending college.  Meanwhile, Gallup reported on Monday that 40% of Americans interviewed in a new poll say their political views are conservative, while 35% consider themselves moderate, and 21% are liberal.  Pundits are debating how to get more people to breastfeed so their IQ’s are higher and they vote using common sense, so the U.S. will return to a free market economy, support individual and states’ rights, and fight terrorism in a practical waterboarding-if-necessary way in America and abroad.

Some guy named Zachary

Some guy named Zachary

“I think that with all the other crap the Democrats are sticking into their multi-trillion-dollar spending bills that we should be able to slip a breastfeeding provision into the healthcare bill.  If it’s found-out and fought by liberals, we may be able to get Bill Clinton to support it and offset them; I know he’s into breasts and stuff.  And once American’s are breastfeeding during office breaks and so-on, we’ll drive up the nations IQ average to a level where we’ll start behaving like traditional common-sense America again,” said Zachary Taylor-Maid, a golf shop pro and breast milk aficionado.  “I mean there’s serious shit to do, and we have to do it fast.  Obama is bankrupting the country and setting the stage for hyper inflation.  China, Russia and India are bailing U.S. Treasury’s and with U.S. printing presses hemorrhaging thousand dollar bills our currency will become worthless.  Meanwhile, he’s giving Miranda rights to terrorists in Afghanistan and taking away individual freedoms from Americans — all the way down to our friggin pocket knives.  Traditional America is on the ropes here.  The recent Republican Congress screwed up, but Obama and the Democrat Congress have us on a course to become a third world economy run by a Latin American styled dictatorship.  I’m worried whether there’s enough breast milk in America to turn this thing around as fast as we need to.”

Someone named Amy

Someone named Amy

“Not everyone thinks like Taylor-Maid.  “I’d be willing to chip-in a little breast milk if I was lactating, if I actually thought that creating a human breast milk product for American’s would be good for the country.  But let’s face it, this is crazy talk.  If you think that breast milk is better for you than Jack Daniels then you’ll probably also believe that Barack Obama doesn’t understand basic economics, rule of law and the U.S. Constitution.  We all know deep down that Barry is like a god and is doing an ingenious job of saving our country,” said Amy Clambake-Hymlick, an alfalfa sprout inspector and part-time nudist.  “The crazy right needs to chill out and realize that there are going to be an occasional US-born Islamic killer who shoots people because he disagrees with them. We’re all part of the whole world now, and there’ll probably be some Islamic extremist beheadings of Christians in the U.S. and there’ll probably be a few complaints when Barack creates his internal army and takes Americans guns and pocketknives away.  But it’s all part of the hope and change plan.  It’s nothing to worry about; Barry is simply integrating America into the world and making it more like a combination of the Middle East, Western Europe and Latin America.  Old style Constitutional law, individual freedom and free market economics don’t fit his vision.  It’s time we relax and get used to it.”

Arkansas JihadAssociated Press reported that Carlos Bledsoe’s transformation from Tennessee youth to an American-born Islamic extremist charged in a bloody rampage outside an Arkansas military recruiting station may signal an ominous new wave of violent homegrown jihadists, counterterror officials say. National security officials have long feared the emergence of a new breed of American militants who would raise little suspicion as they move in and out of the country carrying out the aims of terrorist groups like al-Qaida. Abdulhakim Muhammad, who grew up in Memphis, Tenn., converted to the Islamic faith, changed his name from Bledsoe, and traveled to Yemen in 2007. He was later arrested for overstaying his visa and deported back to the U.S. Muhammad was charged with killing Pvt. William Andrew Long, 23, of Conway, Ark., who had just completed basic training and was volunteering at the west Little Rock recruiting office before starting an assignment in South Korea. He was shot dead on June 1 while smoking a cigarette outside the building. An FBI-Homeland Security intelligence assessment document suggested Muhammad may have considered targeting other locations, including Jewish and Christian sites in several eastern U.S. cities.

Pvt. William Andrew Long

Pvt. William Andrew Long

Muhammad, 23, told The Associated Press in a jail cell interview last week that the shootings were an “act for the sake of God, for the sake of Allah, the Lord of all the world, and also a retaliation on U.S. military.” Earlier this year four Muslim ex-convicts were arrested in New York for allegedly plotting to bomb synagogues and shoot down military planes. While federal authorities foiled the plan, the incident inflamed concerns about the spread of Islamic extremism in prisons. Counterterrorism officials warn that unless individuals attract attention either through criminal behavior or even threat-laced Internet postings, U.S.-born radicals — particularly those operating alone — could go unseen until they take action. “One of the scariest things is that we don’t have a profile for how someone becomes radicalized,” said counterterrorism expert Matthew Levitt. “It’s different for everybody.”

This is raising his IQ, right?

This is raising his IQ, right?

United Press International reported that breastfeeding was associated with an increase in high school grade point average and an increase in the odds of attending college, U.S. researchers said. The study, published in the Journal of Human Capital, looked at the academic achievement of siblings — one of whom was breast fed as an infant and one of whom was not — found that an additional month of breastfeeding was associated with an increase in high school GPA of 0.019 points and an increase in the probability of college attendance of 0.014. “The results of our study suggest that the cognitive and health benefits of breast feeding may lead to important long-run educational benefits for children,” Sabia said in a statement.

Click to enlarge

Click to enlarge

Gallup.com reported that thus far in 2009, 40% of Americans interviewed in national Gallup Poll surveys describe their political views as conservative, 35% as moderate, and 21% as liberal. This represents a slight increase for conservatism in the U.S. since 2008, returning it to a level last seen in 2004. The 21% calling themselves liberal is in line with findings throughout this decade, but is up from the 1990s. These annual figures are based on multiple national Gallup surveys conducted each year, in some cases encompassing more than 40,000 interviews. The 2009 data are based on 10 separate surveys conducted from January through May. Thus, the margins of error around each year’s figures are quite small, and changes of only two percentage points are statistically significant. Thus far in 2009, Gallup has found an average of 36% of Americans considering themselves Democratic, 28% Republican, and 37% independent. When independents are pressed to say which party they lean toward, 51% identify as Democrats, 39% as Republicans, and only 9% as pure independents.

Living on the edge

Living on the edge

In other news, Forbes reported on Saturday that driving is the greatest threat to a woman’s health. If you’re like most women, you probably think breast cancer or maybe heart disease is the greatest risk to your health. Guess again. The real culprit is getting behind the wheel. Automobile accidents are the leading cause of death in women under the age of 35, according to the Centers for Disease Control, and are also a major cause of traumatic brain injury and fatality in women of all ages. But before you throw in your keys for good, a wealth of new research shows that auto accidents are highly preventable. The single best way to stay safe can be summed up like so: “Avoid getting distracted while operating your vehicle.” 

Ben & Jerry'sNo word on whether consuming breast milk or driving during lactation has any impact, but American’s were certainly distracted during the recent elections and the country has crashed into a ditch and our leadership has accelerated us toward a massive cliff.  Here’s hoping we come to our senses with or without pausing for afternoon breast milk breaks.  Mmmm IQ-building GPA-enhancing sweet-breast-milk breaks … who cares what Obama is doing!     Sorry about that, I think Obama & Company may be driving me mad.

(C) 2009 InebriatedPress.com

Source articles:

Recruiter shootings spark homegrown terror fears
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090615/ap_on_go_ca_st_pe/us_homegrown_radicals?ic

Breastfeeding may boost grades
http://www.upi.com/Health_News/2009/06/15/Breastfeeding-may-boost-grades/UPI-27101245042298/

“Conservatives” Are Single-Largest Ideological Group
http://www.gallup.com/poll/120857/Conservatives-Single-Largest-Ideological-Group.aspx

Driving is the real threat to a woman’s health
http://www.ctv.ca/servlet/ArticleNews/story/CTVNews/20090611/Forbes_women_health_090613/20090613?s_name=Autos

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Million Dollar Mattress, Hummingbird Sex, and Obama’s TARP Illusion

> Family tosses mattress housing $1 million cash stash
> G-Force’s during Hummingbird Sex would make Fighter Pilots Pass Out
> Obama’s TARP czar has no idea if it’s working, or where the money’s gone

Inebriated Press
June 12, 2009

Sex at the speed of a Hummingbird

Sex at the speed of a Hummingbird

AFP reported Thursday that a woman threw out her mothers’ old mattress not knowing it was stuffed with one million dollars.  And New Scientist reported Wednesday that during courtship-flights male hummingbirds sustain g-forces during acceleration that would cause a fighter jet pilot to pass out.  Meanwhile, The Weekly Standard reported Tuesday that Obama’s TARP oversight chair doesn’t know if it’s working, and doesn’t know where the money is going.  Vice President Joe Biden adds that “people are being scammed already” in the disbursement of $787 billion.  Some people say all’s fair in speed-sex and political-handouts.

A Happy Woman

A Happy Woman

“If you’re going for high-speed sex you have to expect to pass out now and then, it’s just a physical reality.  And if you’re going to jam though government spending plans so fast that no one reads the documentation or sets up a system of checks and balances, then you’re going to waste most of it, that’s just a bureaucratic reality,” said Happy Lucki-Thimaster, a sex worker and political analyst who built her trade during the Bill Clinton administration. “There’s nothing surprising or unusual about any of this.  And if you’re going to throw out other peoples mattresses without checking with them first, you may be tossing out something more valuable than you think.  But what the heck, all’s fair in fast sex, government mismanagement of your tax dollars, and lost fortunes in old bedding.  Shit happens and lots of times it’s purely predictable.  I can’t help but fantasize about having speed sex on a million dollar mattress bought with TARP funds.  It would be a real rush.  Makes me tingly just thinking about it.  Does it feel warm in here to you?”

Someone named Tricia

Someone named Tricia

Not everyone sees it the way Lucki-Thimaster does.  “Humming birds aren’t having high-speed sex; they’re just flapping their wings really fast, that’s all.  And Obama has his fingers on the pulse of everything and knows exactly what he’s doing and where all our money is going.  He said he’d go through the TARP thing and the budget line-by-line personally, and would account for every penny.  Trust him, he’s not just flapping his lips really fast,” said Tricia Kum-Lately, a circus manager and silicon investor, who often does Dallas just because.  “I had a million dollar mattress once but I quit hooking because it was bothering my back.  Now I work with circus clowns.  It’s remarkable how similar they are to the Democrat Congress and Obama administration — and I mean that in a positive way.  They could run the country just as well.  It gives me confidence that democracy works because it doesn’t take any brains or special training to run the world’s biggest economy.  Joe Biden is proof of that.  I’m so proud of this country.  In fact I think it’s the first time in my life that I’m really proud of America.  I guess I’ve got that in common with Michelle Obama.”

A surprising mattress

A surprising mattress

AFP reported that a stash of cash landed in the trash when a woman in Israel dumped her mother’s mattress not knowing it was stuffed with the equivalent of about one million dollars. Israeli media reported that the 40-year-old woman showed up at a garbage dump in a panic on Tuesday, looking for the valuable bedding. She had bought a new mattress for her mother and, wanting the gift to be a surprise, threw away the old one. She then found out the decades-old mattress contained her mother’s life savings. Workers are helping her search the garbage, but have found no sign of the cash so far.

Real hummingbird sex, or just faking it?

Real hummingbird sex, or just faking it?

New Scientist reported that male hummingbirds are breaking the speed record for love. During courtship flights, male Anna’s hummingbirds sustain accelerations that would cause a fighter jet pilot to pass out. Chris Clark, a biologist at the University of California at Berkeley, believes that the pressures of courtship push males to the limit of what is physically possible. Using high-speed video footage to study their flight, he has shown that, relative to their body size, male Anna’s hummingbirds are the fastest moving vertebrates. As they approach the ground, the hummingbirds spread their wings and tail, letting them pull them up into a skywards glide. At this stage, Clark calculated that their bodies undergo centripetal accelerations reaching 10 g – a force equivalent to 10 times the gravitational pull of Earth. Fighter jet pilots can pass out or temporarily lose their sight at accelerations above 7 g because their blood becomes unevenly distributed in their circulatory system.

We have no clue, but I wouldn't worry.

We have no clue, but I wouldn't worry.

The Weekly Standard reported that Obama’s transparency czar is using $84 million to build a web site that won’t be usable until October, and may not be useful until four years from now. Obama’s stimulus oversight guru, Joe Biden, says “people are being scammed already” in the disbursement of $787 billion. And, when asked whether TARP is working, Prof. Elizabeth Warren— head of the Congressionally formed oversight committee for that particular trillion-dollar project—says: “We can’t disclose what isn’t known. We’ve disclosed as much as we can, we’ve addressed this in our various reports. The Secretary of the Treasury says there are some positive indicators and there some negative indicators still in the economy. And that’s the best we can do.”  Aren’t giant, cumbersome government programs fun, especially now that the Obama administration’s cult of competence is in charge and offering unprecedented transparency and accountability?  When asked if she had a clear sense of what the overall TARP plan was and whether she was capable of summarizing what it’s supposed to be doing, she said: “No. And neither is Treasury. Treasury has given us multiple contradictory explanations for what it’s trying to accomplish.”

Fear not, for the wind and waves obey me

Fear not, for the wind and waves obey me

In other news, Associated Press reported Wednesday that the wind, a favorite power source of the green energy movement, seems to be dying down across the United States. And the cause, ironically, may be global warming – the very problem wind power seeks to address. The idea that winds may be slowing is still a speculative one, and scientists disagree whether that is happening. But a first-of-its-kind study suggests that average and peak wind speeds have been noticeably slowing since 1973, especially in the Midwest and the East. The study, which will be published in August in the peer-reviewed Journal of Geophysical Research, is preliminary, however, a couple of earlier studies also found wind reductions in Australia and Europe, offering more comfort that the U.S. findings are real. The new study “demonstrates, rather conclusively in my mind, that average and peak wind speeds have decreased over the U.S. in recent decades,” said Michael Mann, director of the Earth System Science Center at Penn State University.  No word on how the scientists feel about high-speed sex, million dollar mattresses or wasted TARP money, but you can bet they’re trying to harness the hot air pouring out of D.C. as a new energy source.  Or at least trying to get their piece of the federal budget so they can study it.

(C) 2009 InebriatedPress.com

Source articles:

Dumped mattress lands cash in trash in Israel
http://www.google.com/hostednews/afp/article/ALeqM5hvRwWnDjIUF3gNuTPVjHc7OPjTag

Male hummingbirds break speed record for love
http://www.newscientist.com/article/dn17277-male-hummingbirds-break-speed-record-for-love.html

video — http://brightcove.newscientist.com/services/player/bcpid1873822884?bctid=25816667001

TARP Oversight Chair Says She Doesn’t Know Whether It’s Working
http://www.weeklystandard.com/weblogs/TWSFP/2009/06/tarp_oversight_chair_says_she.asp

US Stimulus Fraud could hit $50B
http://macedoniaonline.eu/content/view/7101/52/

Not so windy: Research suggests winds dying down
http://hosted.ap.org/dynamic/stories/U/US_SCI_DIMINISHING_WINDS?SITE=PAPIT&SECTION=NATIONAL&TEMPLATE=DEFAULT

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Beware of: Falling Computers, Bacteria Laced Skin Care Products, and the Obama Administration

> Home Computer Injuries Leap
> FDA warns against using Clarcon skin products
> U.S. Representative tells China not to believe Obama on Budget

Inebriated Press
June 11, 2009

Risky computer behavior

Risky computer behavior

HealthDay News reported on Tuesday that from 1994 to 2006 there has been a 732 percent increase in home computer injuries nationwide.  Research shows that a growing number of people are tripping over cables and getting hit by falling equipment.  And Associated Press reported Monday that the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) is warning consumers not to use skin products made by Clarcon because of high levels of disease-causing bacteria.  Meanwhile, The Straits Times reported Tuesday that Representative Mark Kirk (R-IL) told Chinese leaders that the US budget deficit could be larger than predicted and the budget that the US government has put forward should not be believed.  Inebriated reporters heavily medicated with Jack Daniels, put forth their view of truth and lies.

Someone named Suzi

Someone named Suzi

“Who gives a rats ass what Republicans say about the budget or the FDA says about skin care products or whether computers are falling from the sky.  Life is risky and if you’re going to be alive for a while, you assume some risks of a personal and financial nature, what the hell.  Anyway, you can’t believe most things that politicians and the government say,” said Suzi Blaktape-Mostly, an occasional reporter when wearing clothing and deciding to behave respectable.  “It’s all one big crap shoot and the administration is lying about the budget and the Republicans are telling tales to the Chinese.  So what?  FDA officials are probably getting fewer kickbacks under this administration so they’re squeezing the skin care companies by talking the bacteria thing.  And no computer has fallen from the sky near me.  I think it’s people getting hurt during rough sex that are using computer injury as an excuse because it’s easier to explain.  At least that’s what I do.”

Someone named Rachael

Someone named Rachael

Not everyone sees it like Blaktape-Mostly.  “The Republicans are telling it the way it is, whether that’s to the Chinese or the American people.  The Obama administration is spending trillions with no revenue stream, and that’s a fact.  And the FDA is trying its damndest to stop people from harming themselves with bad products.  It’s what they do and why the agency exists.  As far as computer injuries go, it just makes sense that if there are more PC’s around then the likelihood of people bumping into them or tripping over the cables is just going to increase,” said Rachael Holddmi-Tiet, an occasional columnist when she’s not working iron at Mikes Steel Mill and BBQ Strip Club.  “It’s true that politicians and government officials stretch the truth, but the Obama administration is setting a whole new standard for misdirection and outright falsehood.  I can’t believe that Obama and his minions are so stupid that they believe they can spend trillions of dollars and have a healthy budget and an inflation free economy.  So that means they have to be lying about it.  Of course I admit I still think that logic can prevail and that people aren’t all morons, so I give common sense a chance.  Maybe that’s the flaw in my thinking.”

Beware of killer computers!HealthDay News reported that computers are everywhere in the home these days — the office, the kid’s room, maybe even on the kitchen table. And that, according to new research, has led to more people showing up in emergency rooms with computer-related injuries. That increase has not been slight: From 1994 to 2006, injuries caused by people tripping over computer wires or getting hit by falling equipment rose from about 1,300 a year to 9,300 a year, an increase of 732 percent nationwide. Children under the age of 5 had the highest injury rate. The leading cause of injury for small children, and for adults over 60, was tripping or falling over computer equipment. But while most injuries were to the extremities such as the arms or legs, young children were five times more likely than other age groups to sustain a head injury.

FDA WarningAssociated Press reported that the Food and Drug Administration warned consumers Monday not to use skin products made by Clarcon because of high levels of disease-causing bacteria found during a recent inspection. Clarcon Biological Chemistry Laboratory Inc. of Roy, Utah, issued a voluntary recall of some skin sanitizers and skin protectants marketed under several different brand names, the FDA said in a statement. Consumers should not use any Clarcon products and should throw them away, the FDA said. Analyses of several samples of over-the-counter topical antimicrobial skin sanitizer and skin protectant products revealed high levels of various bacteria, including some associated with unsanitary conditions, according to the agency. Some of these bacteria can cause opportunistic infections of the skin and underlying tissues and could result in medical or surgical attention as well as permanent damage.

Obama budgetThe Straits Times reported that senior Chinese leaders have privately voiced fear over the soaring US budget deficit and are increasingly looking to diversify from the dollar, Representative Mr Mark Kirk said Monday after a trip to China that included talks with government officials and central bank chief Dr Zhou Xiaochuan. Mr Kirk’s assessment differed with that of Treasury Secretary Mr Timothy Geithner, who said last week on a separate visit that Chinese leaders had expressed ‘justifiable confidence’ on the future of the recession-hit US economy. Mr Kirk said that Chinese leaders were sharply critical in private of the US Federal Reserve’s policy of ‘quantitative easing’ – a form of flooding the financial system with cash, which critics deride as printing imaginary money. Government officials estimate a deficit of 1.841 trillion US dollars for the 2009 budget. 

Lying fun!Mr Kirk, a former diplomat who remains an active reservist in the US Navy, is seen as a rising star in the Republican Party and is eyeing a run next year for Mr Obama’s former US Senate seat in Illinois. He said he told the Chinese that the budget deficit could be even bigger than predicted, due in part to the rising costs to the US economy of health care. “One of the messages I had – because we need to build trust and confidence in our number one creditor – is that the budget numbers that the US government has put forward should not be believed,” Mr Kirk said. “Congress is actually going to spend quite a bit more,” he said. China is the largest creditor to the United States with some 700 billion dollars invested in Treasury bonds.

The nest may be empty ...

The nest may be empty ...

In other news, CNN reported Tuesday that parents adjusting to the last of their children leaving home, find that at first they’re depressed, but then couples spend more time with friends, have impromptu dates and more sex. “I absolutely miss my kids,” said Jane Shure, a 54-year-old mother of two from Philadelphia, who officially became an empty nester in August 2007.  “But I’m enjoying a really full life now.” Sara Gorchoff, Ph.D., a postdoctoral researcher at UC Berkeley, says a fall Sunday with the kids can now become a chance to go hiking together; raucous family meals turn into intimate dinners for two. And sex can regain some of the old abandon of the pre-children days.  No word on how ’empty nesters’ feel about Obama’s budget numbers or bacteria laden skin care products, but my guess is that more of them are in emergency rooms claiming to have been injured by computers rather than from having sex with reckless abandon.  But I’m only guessing.  There’ll probably be a stimulus funded study coming out to tell us the facts any day now.  Just as soon as the tattoo removal in L.A. is completed.

(C) 2009 InebriatedPress.com

Source articles:

Computers Causing Injuries in the Home
http://news.yahoo.com/s/hsn/20090609/hl_hsn/computerscausinginjuriesinthehome

FDA warns against using Clarcon skin products
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090609/ap_on_go_ot/us_clarcon_recall

China airs fears: congressman
http://www.straitstimes.com/Overcoming%2BThe%2BStorm/Latest%2BStories/Story/STIStory_387854.html

Sex and other perks of empty nesting
http://www.cnn.com/2009/LIVING/personal/06/09/o.end.empty.nest.syndrome/index.html

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Microsoft puts Porn in Motion, Chinese Laugh at U.S. Treasury Secretary, and Inmate Escapes new “Anti-Prison” on Day One

> Microsoft’s New Search Engine Puts Mouse-Over Motion in Porn Searches
> Chinese Students Burst Out Laughing During Geithner Speech on Strength of US Dollar
> New $45 Million Warm-Fuzzy Prison has Break-Out First Day It’s Open

Inebriated Press
June 4, 2009

Giving the kids what they've been looking for.

Giving the kids what they've been looking for.

Fox News reported on Tuesday that Bing, Microsoft’s new search engine that went live over the weekend, allows anyone — of any age — to mouse over explicit porn videos on a search page and play them without leaving the search engine or going to the actual website.  Internet safety experts say it’s an easy way for kids to beat “nanny software” designed to keep them from viewing Internet porn.  And Reuters reported on Monday that students at Peking University broke into laughter when U.S. Treasury Secretary Timothy Geithner told them that all of China’s U.S. dollar and bond investments were safe; and that there is no fear of inflation.  Meanwhile, NBC Washington reported Monday that a new prison called the “New Beginnings Youth Center” is described as an “anti-prison” because it’s not as harsh and rigid as a traditional prison.  In fact it’s so friendly that the first day it was open an inmate escaped.  Pundits are debating the strength of U.S. monetary policy, new user-friendly prisons, and Microsoft’s new pro-porn initiative. 

Someone named Celeste

Someone named Celeste

“It seems to me that living an illusion followed by capitulation on any issue is the political and social trend of this new age. It’s being used extensively by the Obama administration and being emulated in other areas of American life and culture.  Just as the Obama’s Treasury pretends that creating a $12 trillion dollar deficit by printing money hand-over-fist won’t create inflation, and eventually will give in to harsh reality and do anything China tells us to do; so too, we create the illusion of prison security and let inmates escape the first day of operation, and just give in to the power of criminal rights over those of the innocent,” said Celeste Milky-Wayy, a proctologist who would rather be an astronomer, but likes her current wage scale better.  “You can see more evidence of that in Microsoft’s new pro-porn web browser that allows anyone running a web search who turns up a porn video, to view it and listen to it by  merely mousing over the image.  Basically it’s Microsoft’s way of saying ‘what the hell, the kids will view porn anyway, maybe they’ll like us and use more of our products if we enable them’.  I’m sure that the hit count on bing.com went through the roof when kids paused sexting long enough to let their friends all know about the Microsoft’s new web search feature.  Apparently the hope and change that Obama is bringing is capitulation to all of our desires for free cash, no inflation, easy-to access porn and on-demand prison exits.  Looks like only the Chinese know such logic is completely crazy.”

Someone named Janice

Someone named Janice

Not everyone sees it the way Milky-Wayy does.  “President Obama saved our ass after the terrible Bush years that were spent wastefully by protecting us from radical Muslims and other silly crap,” said Janice Janice-Janice, an unemployed bartender who likes things in threes.  “The U.S. is on sound financial footing thanks to massive government spending, and the prison inmates will all behave better if they can leave the facility to see a movie or rob a convenience store from time to time — our country is all about freedom and rights you know.  And kids of any age should be allowed to view porn if they want to, so they learn what they should be doing.  If they don’t learn about this stuff we’ll be wasting all the condoms we’re handing out in elementary school, and the birth control patches we’re giving 11-year-old girls.  Unfettered freedom for children, criminals and the federal government is best for America.  The only other thing we need to do to make sure it all works, is get the conservatives to shut up and bust their ass and provide the goods and services that the rest of us need.  It’s what they like to do anyway, so why not let them?  Better still, MAKE them.  Barack can’t change America if things remain the same.” 

bing.com

bing.com

Fox News reported that your kids may get a bang out of Bing — and that’s not a good thing, Internet safety experts warned on Monday. Bing, Microsoft’s new search engine (www.bing.com), went live in the U.S. this weekend, aiming to challenge and possibly unseat industry titan Google. But bloggers and Internet safety experts quickly discovered that one of Bing’s “features” is that it takes only a few clicks for anyone — of any age — to view explicit pornographic videos without even leaving the search engine. In its bid to beat Google, Microsoft has unveiled a slate of convenient features for Bing, including an “autoplay” tool that lets users preview videos simply by hovering a mouse over them. That asset may become a liability, because users can get a taste of porn videos on Bing instead of having to go to a smutty Web site — an innovation other search engines have yet to offer. Technology blogger Loic Le Meur noticed the issue early Monday after testing video search on Bing. What he found was a cornucopia of pornography that he said transformed the search engine into its very own pornographic Web site. “You are now on a porn site without leaving Bing. Amazing,” Le Meur wrote on his blog.

Geithner: No worries! Trust me ... er ... who's laughing? Everyone?

Geithner: No worries! Trust me ... er ... who's laughing? Everyone?

Reuters reported that U.S. Treasury Secretary Timothy Geithner on Monday reassured the Chinese government that its huge holdings of dollar assets are safe and reaffirmed his faith in a strong U.S. currency. A major goal of Geithner’s maiden visit to China as Treasury chief is to allay concerns that Washington’s bulging budget deficit and ultra-loose monetary policy will fan inflation, undermining both the dollar and U.S. bonds. “Chinese assets are very safe,” Geithner said in response to a question after a speech at Peking University, where he studied Chinese as a student in the 1980s. His answer drew loud laughter from his student audience, reflecting skepticism in China about the wisdom of a developing country accumulating a vast stockpile of foreign reserves instead of spending the money to raise living standards at home. China is the biggest foreign owner of U.S. Treasury bonds. U.S. data shows that it held $768 billion in Treasuries as of March, but some analysts believe China’s total U.S. dollar-denominated investments could be twice as high. The Beijing-based Global Times greeted Geithner by publishing a survey of Chinese economists who called big holdings of U.S. debt “risky.” Geithner also offered strong backing for a bigger Chinese role in international policymaking.

New anti-prison, or not, maybe ...

New anti-prison, or not, maybe ...

NBC Washington reported that a youth escaped Saturday from the New Beginnings Youth Center in Laurel, Md. — embarrassing the $45 million juvenile facility that just opened on Friday. The New Beginnings Youth Center in Laurel, Md., was described as an “anti-prison” in many of the warm and fuzzy stories written about it leading up to its opening on Friday. On Saturday the kid escaped by scaling a fence. It appears officials knew that fencing would be a problem, according to the Washington Post. The old Oak Hill facility had razor wire on its fence, but that wasn’t part of the new home. It turned out to be a bad move. A day before the facility opened, Schiraldi and David Muhammad, chief of committed services, said they had brought in young men to try to scale the fences and made modifications based on what they observed. Schiraldi said he planned to place prickly shrubbery, possibly rose bushes, near the fence so inmates would not be tempted to flee. Prickly shrubbery? Something tells us the kids in this facility have seen far worse in their lives than a little prickly shrubbery. So after Saturday’s escape, razor wire was added to the new facility’s fence. So much for the anti-prison.

Must be a mistake, no one can snort this!?

Must be a mistake, no one can snort this!?

In other news, Fox News reported Tuesday that two suitcases carried by a woman who was about to fly from Chile to Spain were virtually made of cocaine, police said. Detective Leandro Morales at the Santiago airport said the drug “was not hidden in the luggage. This time the suitcases were the drug.” The suitcases were made of a substance combining cocaine with resin and glass fiber, Morales told The Associated Press. A “chemical process” could be used to separate out the drug, Morales said, adding that the suitcases were heavier than their contents. The 26-year-old Argentine woman was arrested. No word on how the woman feels about the likelihood of U.S. inflation or mouse-over web porn, but I’ll bet  if she’s sent to lock-down, she’ll happily sign-up for the anti-prison prison.  Unless those prickly rose bushes make her nervous.

(C) 2009 InebriatedPress.com

Source articles:

Microsoft’s New Search Engine Puts Porn in Motion
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,524019,00.html

Chinese students laugh at Geithner’s assurances (about Dollar)
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/news/2262284/posts

Inmate Escapes Day After “Anti-Prison” Opens
http://www.nbcwashington.com/news/local/So-Much-for-the-Anti-Prison.html

Chile Police Discover Suitcases Made of Cocaine
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,524537,00.html

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Hearse Driver Breaks for Beer, “Pulling Out” Rivals Condoms, and Teacher Writes Book about Sex with Students

> Family waits at Cemetery while Hearse Driver Buys Beer
> Study: “Pulling Out” nearly as Effective as Condoms
> Woman teacher writes book describing sexual encounters with ‘favorite’ students

Inebriated Press
June 1, 2009

Beer, the sirens song

Beer, the sirens song

United Press International (UPI) reported Wednesday that the hearse driver for a funeral home stopped for a beer and failed to deliver a body to the cemetery while the family waited.  And CBS News reported Thursday that a new study claims withdrawal before ejaculation during intercourse, is nearly as effective at preventing pregnancy as condoms.  Meanwhile, Fox News reported Wednesday that a British teacher has been fired for publishing a novel describing sexual encounters with some of her students.  Pundits are debating the ethical risks and rewards of beer, condoms, and sex with children.

kareliya“There’s really nothing inherently wrong with teachers having sex with their students as long as the boys pull out soon enough and both the adult and child have been drinking heavily,” said some twisted bastard who will remain unnamed because she is likely to be nominated to the Supreme Court in the future.  “In a society where the random thoughts of a Hispanic woman trumps rule of law, white men and the U.S. Constitution, any freaking thing goes, and that’s how it should be.  Relative ethics, relative law, and sex with relatives and children are all fine.  There are no inherent rights or wrongs, it’s all up to whoever is in power to decide what’s good and bad, who’s happy or sad, who gives up most of their income and the slackers that it should be given to.  As far as the hearse driver who stopped for beer, let’s face it, it’s every person’s right to have beer. So what if the family waited in the cemetery wondering where the body of their loved one went.  The body was dead anyway so it didn’t care, and the family probably had nothing better to do than hang out.  If they’d been smart they’d have been someplace else slamming beer and having pullout sex.  Hope and change baby.  Let’s get with it.”

Someone named Lana

Someone named Lana

Not everyone agrees with the twisted bastard who discards morality and the Constitution, and will probably be on the Supreme Court defining both someday.  “Stopping off to buy beer when you should be delivering the body of a loved one to the family waiting at a cemetery is tasteless and rude — and I’m using kind words.  Go buy beer on your own time, after you’ve done your job.  And the idea that ethics are so relative and random that it’s okay for teachers to have sex with students and write books about it; or to promote the idea that not using condoms is no more risky than using them, is stupid, in addition to being wrong,” said Lana Ethical-Abbs, an account executive whose body and ethics are both lean, strong and attractive to many.  “Fire and then prosecute the teacher for illegal sexual contact with minors, fire the hearse driver and apologize to that poor family, then cut in-half the fee the mortuary was charging them; and then ignore the ridiculous ‘no-condoms are just as good as condoms’ study.  We need common sense and proper application of law, safe sex and beer acquisition.  It doesn’t seem that complicated to me.  But then, Obama just nominated a person to the Supreme Court who disagrees with the very Constitution she’ll be sworn to defend and correctly interpret, so I guess common sense isn’t in vogue anymore.  Liberal empathy is supposed to rule today.  Trouble is it’s funded by conservative taxpayer dollars and the erosion of both the rule of law and economic sustainability.  In the end it amounts to nothingness, the foundation is gone; it’s like ‘building ones house upon the sand’.  A family, society or a country can’t stay strong very long that way.”

HearseUPI reported that the hearse driver for a Bogota funeral home stopped for a beer and failed to deliver a body to the cemetery while the family waited, police said. The Latin American Herald Tribune reported Wednesday that relatives and friends of Tito Vasquez waited for several hours Sunday at the Campos de Cristo cemetery for the hearse to arrive so that they could bury their loved one. Vasquez’s family said they could not understand why his body was not being delivered for the funeral. Police said Vasquez’s body was eventually found in the hearse in the parking lot of a motel in Bogota’s San Bernardo neighborhood.

Jettison delivery! Bail! Bail!

Jettison delivery! Bail! Bail!

CBS News reported that most sexually active people don’t think that the pullout method is a very effective form of contraception, but according to a new study withdrawal before ejaculation during intercourse, is more than just “better than nothing,” and is nearly as effective at preventing pregnancy as condoms. The study, titled “Better than nothing or savvy risk reduction practice? The importance of withdrawal,” appears in the June edition of the journal Contraception. The authors found: “If the male partner withdraws before ejaculation every time a couple has vaginal intercourse, about 4% of couples will become pregnant over the course of a year. However, more realistic estimates of typical use indicate that about 18% of couples will become pregnant in a year using withdrawal. These rates are only slightly less effective than male condoms, which have perfect- and typical-use failure rates of 2% and 17%, respectively.”

Teacher and "favorite"

Teacher and "favorite"

Fox News reported that a British teacher reportedly has been fired for publishing a novel describing sexual encounters with some of her students. The fictional work “Stop! Don’t Read This” focuses on five of Leonora Rustamova’s “favorite” students at Calder High School and addresses the 39-year-old’s growing struggle to view her students as “kids.” She also writes about her tendency to flirt with students and allow them to flirt with and fantasize about her, according to the Daily Telegraph. In addition, the expletive-filled book featured stories of students drinking, skipping school and possibly using drugs. It also named other faculty members, including the school’s headmaster Stephen Ball, the Daily Telegraph reported. When she was suspended in January over the book’s release, more than 250 students and parents demonstrated in support of Rustamova, saying she was only try to encourage the students to read, the Telegraph reported. The school announced on Wednesday that she had been terminated following a disciplinary hearing into her conduct.

Some people say the teacher was simply using the same approach as Playboy’s Hugh Hefner because just at most men buy his porn magazine for the articles, most students are more interested in literature than sex.  A few others are just interested in silly old-fashioned writing and pre-Obama ideals.

Boring traditional American guy

Boring traditional American guy

“Give me a dusty old copy of Shakespeare over a glossy new Maxim any day, I’m way more into cryptic hard-to-read classic bullshit than some hot easy-to-see-through babe busting out of her clothes all over the place,” said some guy busting out of his clothes all over the place and probably lying like hell.  “Today’s ‘new’ trends like teacher-student sex, leaving people rot while you buy beer, and pullout contraception, are pathetic jokes.  Give me a gal with old-fashioned common sense, an in-shape body that will sustain her health in the long run, some old-school Trojans for that ‘just-in-case’ moment, and a couple Jack Daniels on-the-rocks after work.  That may sound boring as hell to some anti-Constitutional relativist who’d rather bang some school children, but my way built America and sustains it today.  It’ll continue sustaining it if the voters will pull their heads out of their asses long enough to elect some leaders who believe in limited government, lower taxes and a free market economy.  It’s time to get our shit together and get back to boring old traditional-American values.  The pretty boy in the White House isn’t doing us any favors.  Believe me.”

no-parkingIn other news, Florida’s St. Petersburg Times reported that Tarpon Springs police blame a local developer for installing fake “no parking” signs around a popular city restaurant that resulted in 233 tickets being written in a two-year span. At the same time, acting police Chief Robert Kochen acknowledged his department’s failure to properly handle the matter. In a 23-page report released this week, Kochen said developer Mike Bronson admitted recently to installing the signs along the city’s right of way after initially denying it. The report says criminal charges against Bronson would not be feasible at this time, but makes no mention of other possible penalties. Kochen said:” The Police Department’s patrol officers were doing their job and they had no reason (at the time) to believe any of these signs may have been unauthorized by the city.”  No word on how the police feel about hearse drivers buying beer instead of delivering bodies, or underage teacher-student sex, but since they were faked out by pretend no-parking signs it’s a good bet that they’re probably also faked out by the “benefits” of no-condom contraception.  But I could be wrong.  It seems that after two-years and a 23-page report they eventually figure shit out.

(C) 2009 InebriatedPress.com

Source articles:

Hearse driver stops for beer
http://www.upi.com/Odd_News/2009/05/27/Hearse-driver-stops-for-beer/UPI-85171243471695/

“Pulling Out” Rivals Condoms, Study Says
http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2009/05/28/health/main5045514.shtml

Better than nothing or savvy risk-reduction practice? The importance of withdrawal
http://www.guttmacher.org/pubs/journals/reprints/Contraception79-407-410.pdf

Report: British Teacher Fired for Writing Racy Novel About Her ‘Favorite’ Students
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,522407,00.html

Teacher sacked over racy novel that named students
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/education/educationnews/5393597/Teacher-sacked-over-racy-novel-that-named-students.html

Fake ‘no parking’ signs fool Tarpon Springs police, who write 233 tickets near Tarpon Turtle restaurant
http://www.tampabay.com/news/localgovernment/article1005017.ece

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Q & A with Bob & Joan: Can Something Be Done About the National Debt and Does Anyone Really Care?

The “Bob and Joan Chronicles” of Inebriated Press
May 27, 2009
 
Q.
 
Bob,
 
Some of you conservatives are whining about Obama’s trillions in new spending and the massive deficit being created, as though it should actually matter to Americans.  Well no one cares about the deficit or the risk of hyper inflation, and even if you say you do, it doesn’t matter because you’re irrelevant. There’s nothing that an individual can do.  It’s a practical impossibility.
 
You should just shut up and enjoy the ride like everyone else.  What do you think you’re accomplishing by telling other people you care about it?  You’re wasting your time you dumb ass.
 
Hugs and kisses,
 
Joan
 
A.
 
My Dearest Joan,
 
Your warm and thoughtful words regarding my time management and the concern I have about America’s debt and the risk of future economic collapse, touches me deeply, and your statement telling me to shut-up because I’m irrelevant, is both kind and loving encouragement.  How I long to set aside petty questions and gently caress your back, neck and shoulders, easing your present tensions, and then softly kiss the bridge of your nose as only I can.  But alas, such is not my mandate.  I must address your misunderstanding about the level of concern among Americans, and most importantly, the power of the individual.
 
Most Americans are worried about the national debt and many are concerned that President Obama is fiscally irresponsible.  In a recent Washington Post/ABC News poll, nearly nine in ten Americans (87 percent) said they were either “very” (59 percent) or “somewhat” (27 percent) concerned about the size of the federal budget deficit.  While many Americans like President Obama personally, they don’t like many of his policies and are worried about his spending and the risky national debt.  Whether elected officials will respond to these concerns or be voted out of office remains to be seen, but more and more citizens are telling them exactly how they feel, and have even begun public protesting – as displayed on April 15th in “tax day rally’s” against the “tax and spending” of both major Parties.  Public pressure will continue to grow as we near the elections in the fall of 2010.  The liberal Democrats controlling Congress and the White House are proving they are who the conservatives said they were.  And American voters are paying attention and have begun reacting against them.  All is not lost on the fiscal front.  Momentum is changing.

Now, about your belief that the individual is irrelevant and that effort by one person — such as myself — to make change is a practical impossibility.  The United States of America was founded on the inalienable rights of the individual.  Rights that the nation’s founders believed were endowed upon individuals by their Creator, and among those rights were the right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.  Initially those words and others in the U.S Constitution and Bill of Rights were conceptual constructs.  Until individuals — farmers, millers, merchants and others – irrelevant people mostly, took up arms and made theory a reality.  Many believed it was impossible for irrelevant rabble to defeat the British Empire, yet the fools did it.  And it was a pipe dream as well as a practical impossibility that any nation would actually try to put men on the moon, yet silly irrelevant Americans – many of them toiling in obscurity – accomplished the mission, and placed a number of their own citizens there.   During World War II, individuals from all around America rolled into Paris freeing it from the Nazi’s.  Individual men and women crossed America, carving out life and civilization in the fields, plains and mountains — building cities, towns, states.  They fought disease, floods, drought, and countless challenges.  They built a new nation – based on the rights of the individual.  And what of the individual and American invention?  How about Alexander Graham Bell, Thomas Edison, Benjamin Franklin, Samuel Morse, George Washington Carver, the Wright Brothers, Bill Gates, and others.  Much more could be written about what common irrelevant Americans have accomplished. 

The irrelevant founded America.  They are its life-blood.  The individual is the heart of America’s constitution.  Protecting those rights and freedoms is important to us.  The impossible is what America is as a nation.  And the impossible has been accomplished from time to time by Americans, often to the surprise and disbelief of other nations.  The freedom, power and rights of the individual are why many Americans are Americans.  The fatalistic belief that the individual is irrelevant is why some American’s gave up being Europeans and left for the ‘New World’.  I and other American’s aren’t inclined to become Europeans today – even though there are some of us who want to become Western European Socialists.  The American electorate has lost its way before and found its way back.  We elected Jimmy Carter and then Ronald Reagan.  We can do it again.

And so, my fine and gentle Joan, I’m here to tell you that the battle for traditional “common sense” America is not over.  “Irrelevant individuals” still believe that they can make a difference — as they have for generations.  And as long as traditional Americans continue to believe that by their actions they will have an impact, they will in fact have an impact.  The 87% who said they were concerned about the national debt, can change the direction of this country.  Those individuals are not really irrelevant.  I am among them.

I hope this finds you cool where you want to be and warm where you need to be.

With the sweetest of wishes and most tender feelings toward you oozing from my core like moisture on my muscular pec’s in the heat of a summer night, I remain most affectionately yours,

Bob

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Coca-Cola drops Sex ad, Condi Rice kicks Ass, and Tricks of the Vegas Sex Trade

> Coke ‘cans’ ad suggesting women should always be open for sex
> Condoleezza Rice knocks back ‘torture’ ambush
> Success in Sex Club biz: anything goes

Inebriated Press
May 7, 2009

Condoleezza attitudeAustralia’s Daily Telegraph reported this week that Coca-Cola has been forced to can a TV ad which authorities say suggested women should be available for sex whenever men want it. And the U.K. Telegraph reported Saturday that Condoleezza Rice defended the Bush administration actions that a group of Stanford students called torture, when they ambushed her recently. Said Rice: “If you were in a position of authority and watched Americans jumping out of 80-storey buildings because these murderous tyrants go after innocent people, then you would have determined to do anything you could that was legal to prevent that happening.”  Meanwhile, an investigative reporter for KLAS-TV Las Vegas reported last week that the secret to sex clubs success, is that they offer nearly anything you want, with anyone who’s willing.  Pundits are wrestling over ideas of whether women should always be available for sex in Las Vegas, or everywhere Coke is sold, and whether Condi Rice should be the current U.S. president.

Someone named Tony

Someone named Tony

“Condi Rice should be president and Sarah Palin the vice president right now. We’d have common sense, governing experience, and two hot women who don’t take shit from anybody running the country; and have something going for us, instead of this see-a-problem-throw-money-at-it, and see-an-enemy-kiss-their-ass bullshit,” said Tony Krushim-Twice, a small business owner who doubles as a bouncer down at the Dance -n- Jerk Lounge and Weight Lifting Club.  “As far as women being available for sex, that’s their business.  They want to sell it in Vegas or give it away wherever Coca-Cola is sold, that’s up to them.  It’s about personal freedom and individual rights.  I hate all of Obama’s nanny-state crap where federal bureaucrats and politicians are supposed to know better than we are, and they take over half of our income to give to other people and then tell us how to live, because they supposedly know better.  That’s bull.  Condi and Sarah wouldn’t take that crap, or try to pass it off as ‘hope and change’ when its totalitarianism dressed up in socialists clothing.  We should ride Obama and his minions out of D.C. on a rail.  I’m a free man.  That’s what the founders of America had in mind.  That’s what we’ve got to get back to in America.  Damn straight.”

Someone named Susan

Someone named Susan

Not everyone agrees with Krushim-Twice.  “The liberal government knows better than regular Americans do, and should be telling us what we can and can’t do, and how much money we get to keep from our paychecks and how much should be spread around by helpful bureaucrats and Democrats.  No one has a right to freedom, or the money they earn, or where and if they live, only the State can grant that,” said Susan Nayzil-Squez, a terrorist sympathizer who currently advises the U.S. Department of Defense when she’s not protesting against American’s right to bear arms.  “If the State says women should be available for sex then they should be available for sex.  If the State says Coca-Cola has to pay U.S. taxes in addition to foreign taxes on all the money they earn outside of the U.S. then they have to pay them.  It’s not about whether U.S. companies survive or leave the U.S. entirely due to the tax structures that the Obama administration is rolling out, it’s about fairness as defined by those in power.  And Obama is the State today, and the State is power, so he’ll tell you what ‘fair’ is.  It’s not complicated.  Authoritarianism has been around for centuries, just not in America.  You’ll get used to it.  Just do whatever Barack says, and you’ll be fine.  If you won’t, well, then expect to be marginalized, taxed out of business, and basically destroyed.  You don’t want that, so just play along.  That’s how these regimes work.  American’s are kind of slow to figure this out, but they’ll fall in line after a few hard knocks.”

Hot CokeThe Daily Telegraph reported that Coca-Cola has been forced to stop running a TV ad which authorities say suggested women should be available for sex whenever men want it. The Advertising Standards Bureau found the advertisement, though light-hearted, was inappropriate to be on TV when children were watching. In the ad a “hero” man who is breaking up with his girlfriend at a roadside cafe is suddenly surrounded by pole dancers. His dumped girlfriend acknowledges the man doesn’t want to be with just one woman, then offers: “Just call me when you want to have fun”. A series of complaints to the advertising watchdog argued the ad degraded women and promoted casual sex for men. The board noted the ad suggested “men should have multiple partners and that women should make themselves available for sex or ‘fun’ whenever the man wants.” “We certainly did not mean to cause offence,” Coke said in a statement to the bureau.

Condi is for real; picture is faked

Condi is for real; picture is faked

The Telegraph reported that Condoleezza Rice behaved magnificently while being ambushed by left-liberal students at Stanford University with a series of “difficult” questions about torture, Abu Ghraib, Guantanamo Bay and US foreign policy under George W Bush. The article said her coolness under fire is magnificent, but more impressive still is her refusal to duck the issues. “Sorry we have to leave”, an official can be heard saying off camera, but Condi isn’t going to take the easy way out: she wants to stand up for her principles and put the pantywaists in their place. “Let me tell you something: unless you were there in a position of responsibility after September 11 you cannot possibly imagine the dilemmas that we faced in trying to protect Americans,” she says.

Rice went on: “A lot of people are second guessing now but let me tell you the second guessing that would have hurt me more is if there had been 3,000 more Americans dying because we didn’t do everything we could to protect them. If you were in a position of authority and watched Americans jumping out of 80-storey buildings because these murderous tyrants go after innocent people then you would have determined to do anything you could that was legal to prevent that happening.”

Condi is similarly robust when rebutting the suggestion that the US has no place dealing with regimes like Saudi Arabia: “You don’t have the luxury in foreign policy of not dealing with a country because you don’t like its human rights practices.” And she is quite withering when the pallid leftie student tries having a go at her about supposed torture at Guantanamo. “Did you know that Guantanamo was called a ‘model medium security prison’ by representatives of the Organization of Security and Cooperation in Europe?” The student reluctantly concedes he hasn’t. “Maybe before you make allegations about Guantanamo, you should READ,” says Condi, with exquisitely measured scorn.  The Telegraph writer said Condi Rice is the “person of color” America really needs in charge right now.

kinky sex clubKLAS-TV Las Vegas reported that sex clubs offer nearly anything you want with anyone who’s willing. They operate in a world of loose regulation, weak enforcement and an anything goes attitude. Technically they are illegal. From wife-swapping to whips and chains, it’s yours if you want it. There is a huge market for clubs that offer every fantasy imaginable for just an entrance fee. County code says that won’t fly. So, why hasn’t there been a crackdown? The answer is more complicated than you’ve heard before. It’s where money, power and sex all come together.

“From bondage, to transgender to Bi to whatever else, we’re the ‘everybody else’ club,” said Mike Powers, the owner and operator of Power Exchange, the newest sex club in Las Vegas. “It’s part of an open-minded alternative aspect of society. It’s like the Elks Club or the Lions, kind of club for extreme interests, perverse interests or bizarre interests.” Clark County code calls sex clubs a “public nuisance.” It defines them as places for “adult social sexual encounters”, where patrons can “voluntarily engage in and/or view” live sex. So, if the county prohibits it, how do the clubs stay in business? The issue is money. Powers brings money into the economy. Powers thinks the county looks the other way because of the taxes and attention he brings to Las Vegas. No one from Clark County or the commissioners wanted to go on camera for the story. They tell Eyewitness News they stand by the ordinance.

Some people say that rule of law is only as strong as its enforcement, and that freedom and democracy is only as strong as its defenders.

Someone named Lynn

Someone named Lynn

“If you can break the law and get away with it, what good is law?  If you say you have individual freedom but the State runs your life, confiscates your financial property through taxation and tells you what doctor you can see and who you can’t, takes ownership of auto companies, insurance companies and financial firms, then dictates executive salaries and so forth, what freedom do you really have,” asked Lynn Browne-Sugare, a bastion of female genius tucked subtly inside a sweet package and sprinkled with common sense.  “Power is at the center of every government and its decisions.  Any time the government increases taxes they take your freedom to spend where you want, on what you want, and where you want, and replace it with a politician’s or bureaucrat’s vision of ‘what’s best’.  Little by little your freedom erodes until all that’s left is the idea, not the reality.  If you won’t stand up for personal freedom and individual rights, the government sure as hell won’t do it for you.  The government will do it to you. What starts as statism, with the government growing in size, scope and power, gradually becomes socialism, then totalitarianism.  Maybe even dictatorship.  Call it what you want, you lose freedom every time the government makes another decision for you, takes another dime from your pocket, ‘helps’ you do what you should be doing for yourself.  Pull your heads out of your collective asses, Americans.  Your freedom is being usurped even as you read this.  Only you can stop it.”

Orwell's 1984In other news, The Boston Globe reported yesterday that MoveOn.org is funding ad’s backing Obama’s push for nationalized healthcare while marginalizing private insurance companies who believe that they can’t compete with taxpayer funded government health insurance. In the ad, two men complain about the public plan option. “It’ll be a disaster for us,” one says.  The second says, “A public healthcare plan means affordable healthcare for everyone. You know what that means. ” The first answers, “Healthy people living longer.”  No word on why you’ll be healthier and live longer if you give control of your healthcare to politicians and bureaucrats who have mismanaged Social Security, Medicare, Medicaid, and virtually all health and retirement related funding in the U.S. But then maybe we’ve forgotten that it’s all about power.  And the less power you have, the better the government will be able to ‘help’ you.  After all, in the Land of Hope and Change, we are no longer endowed by our Creator with inalienable rights to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.  Only the State can grant those.  Anyone who questions this is on Homeland Security’s terrorist watch list.  And the sad thing is, I’m not making that shit up.  Homeland Security came out and said so.  This isn’t 2008 anymore.  This is 2009’s developing version of Orwell’s 1984.
 
(C) 2009 InebriatedPress.com

Source articles:

Coca-Cola forced to can ad over woman available for sex
http://www.news.com.au/dailytelegraph/story/0,22049,25422198-5006007,00.html

Coca-Cola’s pulled ad:

Condi Rice sticks it to the Stanford bleeding hearts
http://blogs.telegraph.co.uk/james_delingpole/blog/2009/05/02/condi_rice_sticks_it_to_the_stanford_bleeding_hearts

Condi kicks ass, YouTube clip:

I-Team: Tricks of the Trade in Las Vegas Sex Clubs
http://www.klas-tv.com/Global/story.asp?S=10275829&nav=menu102_2

Ad spoofs funeral directors on Obama health plan
http://www.boston.com/news/politics/politicalintelligence/2009/05/ad_spoofs_funer.html

moveon.org ad:

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