Extended Drunk or Intellectual Sabbatical

By the Editor
Inebriated Press
June 22, 2009

Inebriated Press columnist on break

Inebriated Press columnist on break

All good things must come to an end, or at least take a break now and then.  Whether this is the end or a break I’m not sure.  I sat around with my scantily clad imaginary Inebriated Press reporters, columnists and pundits and debated just what this is.  Most of the time was spent arguing over whether we were going on an extended drunk or a sabbatical.  In the end the decision was to go on an extended drunk but call it a sabbatical.  You know, being politically correct and all.

Everyone needs a break and a beer now and then

Everyone needs a break and a beer now and then

Much is happening in my business and personal life right now (yes I’m forced to spend time in the real world; the one I occasionally rant about) and that squeezes my I-Press time pretty hard.  It seems best that I step away and focus on some other things right now.  Whether than means Inebriated Press will be back in a few weeks or not, is an open question.  I’ll leave the website up in any case, and you can use the search or category functions to turn up tabloid articles, old Op-Ed’s and rants against liberalism, and other silly stuff, just for drill.  lol 

Inebriated Press was two-years-old yesterday.  Pretty remarkable really.  My first post was on June 21, 2007: “Mad Cows Terrorize London”   For all I know they still do.

Not much else to say.  I’ll be around somewhere, and who knows, I may be back here.  It’s a tough habit to break.

Good luck and smoke’m if you got’em.

~ The Editor

 PS: Hang tough and live your beliefs.  Remember what Edmund Burke said:

Good woman with cigar; whiskey unavailable for comment

Good woman with cigar; whiskey unavailable for comment

“The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.” 

I’d add to that, “good women”.  I like good women.  And good whiskey and good cigars.  And I have a weakness for individual freedom and states’ rights.  I’m kind of simple that way.  Good luck with whatever you are.  :)

Comments Off

Filed under Humor, NEWS

NASA to Bomb Moon, Woman to Skydive Topless, and US Public Wary of Deficit and Obama Governance

> US Space Agency Preps Missile for Moon Explosion in Water Search
> Barmaid with 36GG Bust to Leap Topless from Plane: “I like to live on the edge”
> WSJ Poll finds Americans Fear growing Budget Deficit and Government’s Economic Intervention

Inebriated Press
June 19, 2009

Less risky than Obama's budget?

Less risky than Obama's budget?

Mercury News reported Monday that NASA is preparing to fly a rocket booster into the moon, triggering a six-mile-high explosion that scientists hope will confirm the presence of water.  And the Lancashire Evening Post reported Wednesday that busty barmaid Charlotte Robinson is gearing up for a topless skydive.  Meanwhile, the Wall Street Journal reported Thursday that Americans are increasingly wary of the growing budget deficit and the Obama administrations economic interventions.  Pundits are debating the benefits of blowing up the moon and the U.S. economy, while others consider leaping from airplanes without clothes on.

Someone named Charlotte

Someone named Charlotte

“I think that living on the edge is a hell of a lot of fun and a real rush.  I mean think about it, we’re in an economy that Obama is pumping trillions of dollars into, to remove L.A. tattoos, and build high-speed trains we don’t need, and study why pigs stink — not to mention his move to take over two of the Big Three car companies and nationalize them.  The value of the dollar will free-fall and inflation will go through the roof.  I’m jazzed up just thinking about it and that’s before I imagine myself free-falling at a couple hundred miles per hour with my naked boobs flapping as I plunge toward earth from an airplane.  This is life the way it’s meant to be lived,” said Charlotte Sunblok-Areola, an account executive at the Satin, Lace and Diesel Parts Company. “If it was left to me to blow up the moon I don’t think I could have a better year.  Oh I suppose maybe it could be better if I were able to get rid of a couple STD’s I have from risky sex, but what the heck, I like life on the edge and sometimes it stings a little.”

Someone named Karen

Someone named Karen

Not everyone sees it the way Sunblok-Areola does.  “The NASA moon bombing is a little weird but I suppose maybe its okay in the cause of science, I mean if they find water or something.  But this notion that pumping trillions of dollars into the U.S. economy on shit we don’t need and then call it ‘stimulus’ doesn’t stimulate me at all.  How can anyone call irresponsible spending a responsible thing to do, its foolishness,” said Karen Cashin-Carrey, a fiscal conservative and ethical relativist who pastes disproportionate logic together as best she can, but lately has been coming up empty.  “And this idea that skydiving topless is going to be fun is as logical as government run national healthcare.  You’re not going to get what you’re expecting and it’s going to hurt.  You think the government can operate healthcare better than private industry?  It can’t run Medicare, Medicaid or Social Security.  Why will it do a better job of keeping you healthy?  And skydiving topless will put your breasts out there with blowing dirt and bugs and leaves and shit.  You think it’ll be fun when those things smack against your nipples and breasts at several hundred miles per hour?  Hell no.  Wake up people, you’re not thinking straight.  Doing dumb shit doesn’t just sting a little; it hurts a lot, maybe not today but tomorrow and for a long time afterward.  This stuff doesn’t fix easily, even when you stop the stupidity and start the healing process.”

NASA's Big Bang

NASA's Big Bang

The Mercury News reported that in an unprecedented scientific endeavor — and what may be one of the coolest space missions ever — NASA is preparing to fly a rocket booster into the moon, triggering a six-mile-high explosion that scientists hope will confirm the presence of water. The four-month mission of the Lunar Crater Observation and Sensing Satellite (LCROSS), which will be directed from NASA’s Ames Research Center at Moffett Field, is to discover whether water is frozen in the perpetual darkness of craters near the moon’s south pole. As a potential source of oxygen for life support and hydrogen for rocket fuel, that water would be a tremendous boost to NASA’s plans to restart human exploration of the moon. The plans are for LCROSS to separate from the Centaur booster less than 10 hours before impact and will be less than 400 miles above the moon when the spent rocket booster collides at a speed five times faster than a bullet from a .44 Magnum. NASA plans to stream a live view from LCROSS as the Centaur, followed by the spacecraft, plows into the moon. If all goes as planned it would hit the moon in the early morning hours of Oct. 8.

skydive nakedThe Lancashire Evening Post reported that busty barmaid Charlotte Robinson is gearing up for a skydive with a difference. The 24-year-old, from Catterall in Garstang, will jump 14,000ft from a Turbine Porter aircraft – topless. The bubbly mother-of-one will be strapped to the front of an instructor and will freefall at more than 120mph before the parachute opens. She is hoping the jump, at the Black Knights Parachute Centre, Hillam Lane, Cockerham, will raise hundreds of pounds for the North West Air Ambulance. She said: “I don’t know if I’ll hurt myself – I might do because I’m a 36GG. I don’t know how the topless part came about. I’m just a bit mental really and definitely outgoing. I’m a bit nervous. The only other thing I’ve done is a bungee jump when I was about 12. But I do like to live on the edge.”

click to enlarge (stop spending to shrink)

click to enlarge (stop spending to shrink)

The Wall Street Journal reported that after a fairly smooth opening, President Barack Obama faces new concerns among the American public about the budget deficit and government intervention in the economy as he works to enact ambitious health and energy legislation, a new Wall Street Journal/NBC News poll finds. These rising doubts threaten to overshadow the president’s personal popularity and his agenda, in what may be a new phase of the Obama presidency. “The public is really moving from evaluating him as a charismatic and charming leader to his specific handling of the challenges facing the country,” says Peter D. Hart, a Democratic pollster who conducts the survey with Republican Bill McInturff. Going forward, he says, Mr. Obama and his allies “are going to have to navigate in pretty choppy waters.”

Nearly seven in 10 survey respondents said they had concerns about federal interventions into the economy; including Mr. Obama’s decision to take an ownership stake in General Motors Corp., limits on executive compensation and the prospect of more government involvement in health care. A solid majority — 58% — said that the president and Congress should focus on keeping the budget deficit down, even if takes longer for the economy to recover. Mr. Obama’s overall job approval and personal ratings have slipped, particularly among independent voters. His job approval rating now stands at 56%, down from 61% in April. Among independents, it dropped from nearly two-to-one approval to closely divided. When asked what the most important economic issue facing the country is, 24% cited the deficit, vs. just 11% who named health care.

No pornIn other news, the Telegraph reported Tuesday that a woman has cancelled her church wedding and country house reception after discovering her fiancé is a secret porn star. Haylie Hocking, 27, only found out that strapping 30-year-old fitness fanatic Jason Brake made adult films just weeks before the big day. A friend organizing her hen night searched online for a male stripper and spotted Jason with a woman in a porn movie. Now Haylie has called her vicar to cancel the wedding. She said: “There was no way I could marry an adult film star.” He told her he was a personal trainer when the couple began dating. After eight months, he proposed and bought her a diamond engagement ring. But Jason’s secret emerged when Haylie’s friend Lisa tried to book a stripper for a hen party. After Jason finally admitted he was earning money from making porn, Haylie called off the wedding. Haylie said: “I don’t know if I will ever be able to trust a man again.”  No word on whether she trusts politicians with her healthcare, or how she feels about NASA bombing the moon, but she seems pretty traditional so she probably has no plans to leap from a plane topless with her breasts pummeling her face and arms and being pummeled themselves.  But I could be wrong.  After all, Americans elected a president with no governing or business experience.  Sometimes rational people do irrational things.  Maybe there are times when the pummeling we get, we deserve.  But smart folks learn from their mistakes.  Here’s hoping Americans are smart folks.  Time will tell.

(C) 2009 InebriatedPress.com

Source articles:

NASA/Ames ready to explode one of the coolest space missions ever
http://www.siliconvalley.com/ci_12590357

Busty barmaid prepares for topless skydive
http://www.lep.co.uk/news/Busty-barmaid-prepares-for-topless.5372581.jp

Public Wary of Deficit, Economic Intervention
http://online.wsj.com/article/SB124527518023424769.html#mod=testMod

Woman cancels wedding after finding fiancé was porn star
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/5549158/Woman-cancels-wedding-after-finding-fiance-was-porn-star.html

Comments Off

Filed under Humor, IP News

Obama upbeat on Change in Iran, “Missing” Man took Break from Wife, and Girl’s body Dug Up to be “Corpse Bride”

> President Obama concerned but upbeat on Iran
> Man reported missing says wife told him to “go away”
> Five men arrested for exhuming corpse to be “ghost bride”

Inebriated Press
June 18, 2009

Obama: things are looking up in Iran

Obama: things are looking up in Iran

MSNBC reported Tuesday that President Obama is concerned about the election in Iran but sees more “openness” in the country as some voters express dissent.  And The Oregonian reported Monday that a man reported missing by his wife last week was located Saturday. But he says he wasn’t missing — just following his wife’s wishes to go away. Meanwhile the Telegraph reported Monday that five people have been arrested in China for digging up the corpse of a young woman to be a “ghost bride” for a man killed in a car crash. Pundits debate the nature of hope and change as it’s reflected in Iranian dissent, husbands who go away, and the wedded bliss of dead brides.

Someone named Wendy

Someone named Wendy

“The nature of cultural change is one of incremental development, often in an evolutionary sense and occasionally with a predisposition to growth and improvement based on hope and initiative.  This is exemplified in Iran with the careful rioting of the people and the governments thoughtful reaction of shooting them, and shutting down cell phone and Internet communications,” said Wendy Wontyou-Maybee, a nurse and part-time intellectual who believes that multidimensional space is subdivided by cats, but isn’t sure how.  “The ethereal nature of the dead being married to the dead is a spiritual connection and it’s enhanced for the wedding attendees by the actual digging up of the bodies, the sweat, the smell and the general fooling around.  The wandering off of a husband told to go away is also a sort of spiritual response filled with subtle meaning.  Barack Obama senses and understands all these things in a deeper way than mere mortals and that’s why he can speak intellectual teleprompter knowledge that transcends our brain waves to the extent that some people even think he’s absurd and almost stupid.  Barry’s genius exists at levels above the common people.  And no woman will ever tell him to ‘go away,’ because he’s a real hunk.  I say that in a metaphysical sense and with great meaning and nuance.  Nuance is so cool.  Sometimes I like to sit naked in a field and imbibe the ethereal nuance that is life. It’s really great except for the chigger bites.”

Someone named Ursula

Someone named Ursula

Not everyone agrees with Wontyou-Maybee. “This is some twisted shit, let me tell you.  There’s no ‘nature of hope and change’ to talk about here.  Obama and the five Chinese are off the rails, I don’t know about the husband who decided to ‘go away’.  There is lots of nasty stuff behind all three of these issues if we’re open and honest about it,” said Ursula Twice-Plaid, a scuba-diving instructor and part-time post master who values silicon and leather but likes individual freedom and personal responsibility even more.  “I don’t really get into judging other cultures and stuff, but digging up a dead woman to marry a dead guy is morose. The Chinese may have invented fireworks, but this dead marriage thing isn’t one of their highest achievements.  And the culture of Iran isn’t changing because there are some people pissed-off in that country.  They’re always pissed-off.  That’s why the Shah is gone and Islamofascists are running the damn country today.  I’m not saying there aren’t some people who want to change their government and make it more peaceful, but I am saying that some people complaining in a Middle Eastern country is hardly a sea change, let alone a reason for optimism.  I mean come on, think about it.”

click to enlarge

click to enlarge

MSNBC reported that President Barack Obama expressed “deep concerns” about the election in Iran and said the outpouring of political dissent signals more openness in that country. Republican Sen. John McCain urged more forceful condemnation of what he called a “flawed” election. Obama stopped short of saying the re-election of hard-liner Mahmoud Ahmadinejad was rigged. “I do believe that something has happened in Iran,” with Iranians more willing to question the government’s “antagonistic postures” toward the world, Obama said. Obama has said nothing about the declared winner, Ahmadinejad, or the pro-change challenger Mir Hossein Mousavi whose supporters claim the election was stolen. After deadly protests in Tehran on Monday, with demonstrators holding signs that read, “Where Is My Vote,” the clerical regime organized a counter-rally Tuesday. Ahmadinejad traveled to Russia on Tuesday after delaying a trip for a day but did not mention the Iranian election or unrest. Instead, he focused on a traditional target, the United States. “America is enveloped in economic and political crises, and there is no hope for their resolution,” he said through an interpreter. “Allies of the United States are not capable of easing these crises.”

Not missing, just fishing

Not missing, just fishing

The Oregonian reported that a man reported missing by his wife last week was located Saturday. But he says he wasn’t missing — just following his wife’s wishes to go away. William Peterson told police he and his wife had an argument and she told him to get out. So, Peterson spent the week fishing and camping in Bend. His wife, Pam Peterson, said that the argument with her husband happened months ago, and that she forgot about telling her husband he could always leave. Apparently, her husband had not forgotten, she said. Peterson, 53, was reported to have left his home on June 6. Pam Peterson, told police her husband left on an overnight fishing trip without saying where he was going. He had done that before, but when he failed to appear at work she reported him missing.  Cornelius Police Cmdr. Ed Jensen said the search for Peterson involved the U.S. Forest Service, as well as law enforcement officers from Linn, Lane and Marion counties. He estimated that thousands of dollars were spent on the search.

Dying to become a bride?

Dying to become a bride?

The Telegraph reported that five people have been arrested in China for digging up the corpse of a young woman to be a “ghost bride” for a man killed in a car crash. The men were caught after unearthing the remains of a teenage girl who had poisoned herself after failing her university entrance exams last year, a newspaper in Xianyang in China’s Shaanxi province reported. In rural China, superstitious villagers have for centuries sought out the bodies of recently deceased women to be ghost brides for young men who die single. Marriage ceremonies are conducted for the two corpses, and the bride is placed in the same grave as her husband. Last year, a gang in southern China was arrested for strangling young women to sell as ghost brides when the supply of female corpses in their area ran short.

click to enlarge

click to enlarge

In other news, MSNBC reported Tuesday that Supreme Court nominee Sonia Sotomayor is defending her membership in an elite all-women’s club, telling senators the group doesn’t discriminate unfairly by gender even though men can’t belong to the club. She said the club “involves men” in many of its activities. No word on why a “wise Latina female” should be subject to such questioning when everyone knows that her very existence makes her more intelligent and more capable than most people, and white men in particular.  But perhaps some Americans are still struggling with the ethereal nature of “hope and change” based discrimination and haven’t adjusted to the finer points the new world Obama is making for us.

(C) 2009 InebriatedPress.com

Source articles:

Obama troubled by Iran but sees change
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/31390176/ns/world_news-mideastn_africa/

“Missing” Cornelius man was taking break from his wife
http://www.oregonlive.com/washingtoncounty/index.ssf/2009/06/missing_cornelius_man_was_taki.html

Teenage girl dug up to be ‘corpse bride’
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/asia/china/5541242/Teenage-girl-dug-up-to-be-corpse-bride.html

Sotomayor defends women’s club membership
Judges’ code forbids joining groups that discriminate by sex, race, and religion
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/31390593/ns/politics-white_house/

Comments Off

Filed under Humor, IP News

Home Grown US Terrorism, Breastfeeding Boosts GPA, and Most American’s are Conservatives

> American-born Islamic murderer spikes fear of more
> Breastfeeding leads to higher grade point average and college attendance
> Gallup poll: 40% of Americans are conservative, 35% moderate, 21% liberal

Inebriated Press
June 17, 2009

Harvesting higher IQ's and better GPA's

Harvesting higher IQ's and better GPA's

Associated Press reported Monday that an American-born Tennessee youth who became an Islamic extremist and then murdered U.S. Army recruiter Pvt. William Andrew Long on June 1 while he stood outside his Arkansas office smoking a cigarette, is sparking fears that there may be more.  And United Press International reported Monday that a new study shows that breastfeeding is associated with an increase in high school grade point average, and an increase in odds of attending college.  Meanwhile, Gallup reported on Monday that 40% of Americans interviewed in a new poll say their political views are conservative, while 35% consider themselves moderate, and 21% are liberal.  Pundits are debating how to get more people to breastfeed so their IQ’s are higher and they vote using common sense, so the U.S. will return to a free market economy, support individual and states’ rights, and fight terrorism in a practical waterboarding-if-necessary way in America and abroad.

Some guy named Zachary

Some guy named Zachary

“I think that with all the other crap the Democrats are sticking into their multi-trillion-dollar spending bills that we should be able to slip a breastfeeding provision into the healthcare bill.  If it’s found-out and fought by liberals, we may be able to get Bill Clinton to support it and offset them; I know he’s into breasts and stuff.  And once American’s are breastfeeding during office breaks and so-on, we’ll drive up the nations IQ average to a level where we’ll start behaving like traditional common-sense America again,” said Zachary Taylor-Maid, a golf shop pro and breast milk aficionado.  “I mean there’s serious shit to do, and we have to do it fast.  Obama is bankrupting the country and setting the stage for hyper inflation.  China, Russia and India are bailing U.S. Treasury’s and with U.S. printing presses hemorrhaging thousand dollar bills our currency will become worthless.  Meanwhile, he’s giving Miranda rights to terrorists in Afghanistan and taking away individual freedoms from Americans — all the way down to our friggin pocket knives.  Traditional America is on the ropes here.  The recent Republican Congress screwed up, but Obama and the Democrat Congress have us on a course to become a third world economy run by a Latin American styled dictatorship.  I’m worried whether there’s enough breast milk in America to turn this thing around as fast as we need to.”

Someone named Amy

Someone named Amy

“Not everyone thinks like Taylor-Maid.  “I’d be willing to chip-in a little breast milk if I was lactating, if I actually thought that creating a human breast milk product for American’s would be good for the country.  But let’s face it, this is crazy talk.  If you think that breast milk is better for you than Jack Daniels then you’ll probably also believe that Barack Obama doesn’t understand basic economics, rule of law and the U.S. Constitution.  We all know deep down that Barry is like a god and is doing an ingenious job of saving our country,” said Amy Clambake-Hymlick, an alfalfa sprout inspector and part-time nudist.  “The crazy right needs to chill out and realize that there are going to be an occasional US-born Islamic killer who shoots people because he disagrees with them. We’re all part of the whole world now, and there’ll probably be some Islamic extremist beheadings of Christians in the U.S. and there’ll probably be a few complaints when Barack creates his internal army and takes Americans guns and pocketknives away.  But it’s all part of the hope and change plan.  It’s nothing to worry about; Barry is simply integrating America into the world and making it more like a combination of the Middle East, Western Europe and Latin America.  Old style Constitutional law, individual freedom and free market economics don’t fit his vision.  It’s time we relax and get used to it.”

Arkansas JihadAssociated Press reported that Carlos Bledsoe’s transformation from Tennessee youth to an American-born Islamic extremist charged in a bloody rampage outside an Arkansas military recruiting station may signal an ominous new wave of violent homegrown jihadists, counterterror officials say. National security officials have long feared the emergence of a new breed of American militants who would raise little suspicion as they move in and out of the country carrying out the aims of terrorist groups like al-Qaida. Abdulhakim Muhammad, who grew up in Memphis, Tenn., converted to the Islamic faith, changed his name from Bledsoe, and traveled to Yemen in 2007. He was later arrested for overstaying his visa and deported back to the U.S. Muhammad was charged with killing Pvt. William Andrew Long, 23, of Conway, Ark., who had just completed basic training and was volunteering at the west Little Rock recruiting office before starting an assignment in South Korea. He was shot dead on June 1 while smoking a cigarette outside the building. An FBI-Homeland Security intelligence assessment document suggested Muhammad may have considered targeting other locations, including Jewish and Christian sites in several eastern U.S. cities.

Pvt. William Andrew Long

Pvt. William Andrew Long

Muhammad, 23, told The Associated Press in a jail cell interview last week that the shootings were an “act for the sake of God, for the sake of Allah, the Lord of all the world, and also a retaliation on U.S. military.” Earlier this year four Muslim ex-convicts were arrested in New York for allegedly plotting to bomb synagogues and shoot down military planes. While federal authorities foiled the plan, the incident inflamed concerns about the spread of Islamic extremism in prisons. Counterterrorism officials warn that unless individuals attract attention either through criminal behavior or even threat-laced Internet postings, U.S.-born radicals — particularly those operating alone — could go unseen until they take action. “One of the scariest things is that we don’t have a profile for how someone becomes radicalized,” said counterterrorism expert Matthew Levitt. “It’s different for everybody.”

This is raising his IQ, right?

This is raising his IQ, right?

United Press International reported that breastfeeding was associated with an increase in high school grade point average and an increase in the odds of attending college, U.S. researchers said. The study, published in the Journal of Human Capital, looked at the academic achievement of siblings — one of whom was breast fed as an infant and one of whom was not — found that an additional month of breastfeeding was associated with an increase in high school GPA of 0.019 points and an increase in the probability of college attendance of 0.014. “The results of our study suggest that the cognitive and health benefits of breast feeding may lead to important long-run educational benefits for children,” Sabia said in a statement.

Click to enlarge

Click to enlarge

Gallup.com reported that thus far in 2009, 40% of Americans interviewed in national Gallup Poll surveys describe their political views as conservative, 35% as moderate, and 21% as liberal. This represents a slight increase for conservatism in the U.S. since 2008, returning it to a level last seen in 2004. The 21% calling themselves liberal is in line with findings throughout this decade, but is up from the 1990s. These annual figures are based on multiple national Gallup surveys conducted each year, in some cases encompassing more than 40,000 interviews. The 2009 data are based on 10 separate surveys conducted from January through May. Thus, the margins of error around each year’s figures are quite small, and changes of only two percentage points are statistically significant. Thus far in 2009, Gallup has found an average of 36% of Americans considering themselves Democratic, 28% Republican, and 37% independent. When independents are pressed to say which party they lean toward, 51% identify as Democrats, 39% as Republicans, and only 9% as pure independents.

Living on the edge

Living on the edge

In other news, Forbes reported on Saturday that driving is the greatest threat to a woman’s health. If you’re like most women, you probably think breast cancer or maybe heart disease is the greatest risk to your health. Guess again. The real culprit is getting behind the wheel. Automobile accidents are the leading cause of death in women under the age of 35, according to the Centers for Disease Control, and are also a major cause of traumatic brain injury and fatality in women of all ages. But before you throw in your keys for good, a wealth of new research shows that auto accidents are highly preventable. The single best way to stay safe can be summed up like so: “Avoid getting distracted while operating your vehicle.” 

Ben & Jerry'sNo word on whether consuming breast milk or driving during lactation has any impact, but American’s were certainly distracted during the recent elections and the country has crashed into a ditch and our leadership has accelerated us toward a massive cliff.  Here’s hoping we come to our senses with or without pausing for afternoon breast milk breaks.  Mmmm IQ-building GPA-enhancing sweet-breast-milk breaks … who cares what Obama is doing!     Sorry about that, I think Obama & Company may be driving me mad.

(C) 2009 InebriatedPress.com

Source articles:

Recruiter shootings spark homegrown terror fears
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090615/ap_on_go_ca_st_pe/us_homegrown_radicals?ic

Breastfeeding may boost grades
http://www.upi.com/Health_News/2009/06/15/Breastfeeding-may-boost-grades/UPI-27101245042298/

“Conservatives” Are Single-Largest Ideological Group
http://www.gallup.com/poll/120857/Conservatives-Single-Largest-Ideological-Group.aspx

Driving is the real threat to a woman’s health
http://www.ctv.ca/servlet/ArticleNews/story/CTVNews/20090611/Forbes_women_health_090613/20090613?s_name=Autos

Comments Off

Filed under Humor, IP News

Japanese Girls like Tough Guys, Florida’s New Underwear Law, and Media’s View of Obama as God

> Women in Japan crazy about Shogun Warlords: “picture-perfect masculinity”
> City in Florida passes new law requiring underwear
> Newsweek Editor on Obama: “He’s sort of God”

Inebriated Press
June 16, 2009

Busted

Busted

The Mainichi Daily News reported Saturday that young women are flocking to landmarks from the Warring States period, and college girls are buying up samurai-themed products. There is a constant shortage of men’s “armor” underwear and 80 percent of the buyers are women.  And Florida’s St. Petersburg Times reported that the Brooksville City Council has passed new rules that require people to wear clothes that “fit properly” and the wearing of underwear.  Enforcement of the new rules is in question.  Meanwhile, The New Republic reported that longtime Newsweek editor Evan Thomas told MSNBC’s Chris Matthew’s that Barack Obama stands above the country, above the world, as a “sort of God”.  Pundits are debating the power of underwear and Obama’s godhood.

Someone named Andrea

Someone named Andrea

“Pardon me if I don’t believe that Obama is God or that underwear in any form is destined to give me power I don’t currently have.  I understand the idea that putting great faith into something or someone can cause change in that it alters our perspectives and influences our behavior, but power and godhood from panties or a community organizer is a bit of a stretch,” said Andrea Aloha-Alabaster, a pastry chef and sensuous Hawaiian without a birth certificate who plans to run for government office some day.  “Political power is given by the people to a leader in the same way states grant authority to the federal government.  At least that’s how it’s supposed to work.  The federal government should not impose its will upon the states, unless the states grant it that right.  And no president should impose their will, or act like a god, unless the citizens establish that power within the presidency — and they have not.  Obama is no god, and my underwear, although silky and comfortable when I wear them, grants me no greater power than I carry already as an American citizen and an intelligent and cogent human being.  I am as I should be, let government and elected leaders be as they should be.  Now enough of the bullshit.”

Power underwear

Power underwear

Not everyone sees it the way Aloha-Alabaster does.  “When I have on my red underwear and garters with black stockings I wield power over men that I don’t have if I just wear my pink panties with the days-of-the-week on them.  There’s no question in my mind that the right underwear gives me power well beyond that of a typical person on a Tuesday.  And Barack Obama is way more than an organizer; he clearly is a god, maybe THEE god, because no typical organizer without government or business experience could have been elected president of the United States.  He must be god — or a demon — I’m pretty sure he’s the god thing,” said Cassy Sassy-Leather, a pole polisher down at the Hot Lace and Cool Leather Lounge.  “And power simply accrues to those who wield it indiscriminately unless they’re restricted.  No one is restricting Barack, so he’s on his way to ruling as god on earth.  And the federal government is absorbing states rights and assuming their power.  It’s no big deal; it’s just the way things work if no one stops it.  See this black bra and these red satin panties?  Watch me walk past those guys over there.  They’d kiss my ass and worship me if I asked them.  I’m like a god with these on in here.  Only Obama can get his ass kissed more than I can, but then he actually is god so you have to expect that.”

On the hunt for picture-perfect masculinity

On the hunt for picture-perfect masculinity

The Mainichi Daily News reported that young women are flocking to significant landmarks from the Warring States period, and college girls are buying up samurai-themed products. Sales of historical books are up, and there have been efforts to revive the publication of paperbacks on warlords. On weekends, Jidai Shobo, a bookstore specializing in historical books in Tokyo’s Chiyoda Ward, is packed with groups of young women. Stationery and mobile phone accessories with family crests of feudal lords line the shelves, with figurines of Sanada Yukimura, the most popular of the warlords, and others also for sale. “I like Kato Kiyomasa,” says customer Izumi Sekine, 34, of a warlord who served the shogun Tokugawa Ieyasu. “There’s an almost picture-perfect masculinity about him.”  More unorthodox products have seen a boost in sales as well. There is a constant shortage in stock of Sido brand underwear or men’s “armor” underwear, which cost a considerable 9,240 a pair. According to Tokyo-based manufacturer Rogin, about 80 percent of buyers are women. Researcher Tetsuaki Higashida from the Dentsu Communication Institute suggests that women are attracted to the masculinity of these warlords, compared to the more passive modern men that they know.

Can't work in this town girl

Can't work in this town girl

The St. Petersburg Times reported that if you want to work for the city of Brooksville, be sure that you use deodorant, that your clothes fit properly and that you cover up your wounds and tattoos. And, for goodness sake, wear underwear. If not, you could violate the city’s new dress code. The Brooksville City Council approved a dress and appearance policy by a count of 4-1 this month, with only Mayor Joe Bernardini casting the dissenting vote. He questioned how the code would be interpreted and enforced. “They said you had to wear undergarments,” Bernardini said, “but who’s going to be the judge of that? Sometimes when it comes to certain people going bra-less, it’s obvious. But who’s staring to see if that person doesn’t have underwear on?” City department heads and managers will be required to interpret and enforce the dress code.

"He's sort of God"

"He's sort of God"

The New Republic reported that Evan Thomas, a longtime editor at Newsweek, told Chris Matthews’s on MSNBC: “I mean, in a way, Obama’s standing above the country, above–above the world, he’s sort of God.” Such words would wreak havoc on any person’s ego, even Barack Obama’s. It also would enrage his enemies. After all, the president has told us that he is a mere student of history, and that he is. But history these days is no longer a discipline inclined to defend the truthfulness of its claims or the reasonableness of its arguments or the plausibility of its conclusions. More and more, history has become a competition between and among narratives, self-consciously disdainful of what we used to think of as fact. In this intellectual competition, the losers almost always win or, at least, they win the “moral argument.” Not in real history, mind you, but in many a Western professor’s classroom. And, sometimes, in an American president’s mind.

The truth is that Barack Obama has a penchant for narratives and yet an inclination to rise above them. Two grand but antithetical stories about the same problem, awaiting him and his Olympian skill for the discovery of “common ground”: That is Obama’s favorite script. He regards himself as a kind of unprecedented referee between histories and philosophies. He likes to think that he can see what others cannot see and that, therefore, they must come to him if they wish to live in peace and with meaning.

Obama: New GodIn addressing American intelligence and security professionals at the National Archives, the president aimed at bridging differences by showing that apparent contradictions are not contradictions at all and that everything will go together, if only for as long as he is speaking. National security that never compromises national values? No problem. National values that guarantee national security? Say it and it will be done. Yes, we have values that elevate and restrict us at once, the ideal of free men and women that procedurally protects also the guilty and the wicked–and never mind that, absent energetic domestic and international defenses, these principles would be outmaneuvered and outclassed on both fronts. And again at Notre Dame, the same above-it-all structure of rhetorical conciliation was applied by Obama to the subject of abortion. “Open hearts. Open minds. Fair-minded words.” Nice enough. But the debate on abortion will not be so tidily retired. All of this is rising above but not really reconciling anything. [Editors note: some people refer to Obama’s rhetorical approach as an exercise in “bullshit”; that’s a technical term]

Sex on the beachIn other news, Live Science reported on Friday that summer time sex is risky. With its warm nights, the summer season often brings out the best and the most adventurous feelings of love and lust. Why confine sex to the bedroom, or even the house, when there are beaches and pools and hot tubs to host our most private moments? A few reasons, as it turns out. Condom companies don’t test their products in such a condition, and therefore can’t vouch for their effectiveness when used in pools, hot tubs or other wet and wild setups. You might want to avoid water sex anyway, as improperly maintained pools, hot tubs and Jacuzzis can be breeding grounds for bacteria. And sand isn’t so good either.  According to researchers, 91 percent of the beaches they studied had detectable levels of enterococci (bacteria that can cause urinary tract infections, endocarditis, diverticulitis and meningitis), and 62 percent of them had traces of E. coli. No word on how masculinity-seeking Japanese women feel about summer sex but I’m sure that Obama’s national healthcare plan will have something to say on the subject.  And it’ll be right on target.  Because god always is.

(C) 2009 InebriatedPress.com

Source articles:

New wave of ‘history girls’ wooed by warlords’ masculinity
http://mdn.mainichi.jp/mdnnews/national/news/20090613p2a00m0na027000c.html

Brooksville’s new dress code requires deodorant, underwear
http://www.tampabay.com/news/politics/local/article1009923.ece

Narrative Dissonance
“I mean, in a way, Obama’s standing above the country, above–above the world, he’s sort of God.”
http://www.tnr.com/politics/story.html?id=cd70b25d-12b5-4f6f-8fd3-4a965be569f3

The Risks of Summer Sex
http://news.yahoo.com/s/livescience/20090612/sc_livescience/therisksofsummersex

Comments Off

Filed under Humor, IP News

Miranda Rights for Terrorists, Pocket Knife Bans for Americans, and Men Reject Centerfolds for Miss Average

> Obama Administration Orders U.S. Miranda rights for Afghan Combatants
> Obama Administration’s New Rules would Ban Legal Pocketknives in U.S.
> Researchers say Men Prefer Regular Women over Playboy Models

Inebriated Press \ Division of Rant (with Pretzels)
June 15, 2009

Hope and Change Baby

Hope and Change Baby

The Weekly Standard reported Wednesday that the Obama Justice Department has ordered FBI agents to read Miranda rights to high value detainees captured and held at U.S. detention facilities in Afghanistan.  This means they get the same rights as an American arrested for speeding on a U.S. street, and can have a government attorney defend them if they want one.  And WorldNetDaily reported Tuesday that the U.S. Customs and Border Protection Agency is proposing a new definition that could be used to eliminate 8 of 10 legal pocketknives in the United States.  Meanwhile, the Herald Sun reported Friday that researchers have found that men think real women come closest to the ideal body shape rather than the figures of Playboy centerfolds.  Pundits debate why Obama is giving terrorists rights and taking them away from Americans, while men at Inebriated Press exercise their right to hook up with the girls-next door.

Average Jane for Average Joe

Average Jane for Average Joe

“I like my women silicon-free, smart and nice and not so into themselves that they think they have to look like a Playboy chick or act like Paris Hilton in order to get a date.  I also like my pocketknives long and easy to open, and terrorists who try to kill Americans put on a waterboard if it’ll help our cause.  Okay so I’m not cut from the same cloth Obama or Hugh Hefner is — I’m actually happy about that,” said Joe Shmo-Studd, a commodities trader and part-time bouncer down at Susie’s Regular Girl and Regular Guy Beer Emporium.  “Obama said he loved America and wanted to change it, and by damn he’s changing it alright.  I wonder what he loved about it?  Obviously it’s not the individual freedom and opportunity provided to regular Americans.  He’s taking away our freedoms, giving unjustified rights to terrorists, and mortgaging several generations’ futures by spending money we don’t have.  I’m praying that the Republican Party get’s it’s shit together and behaves like Reagan did, and can take Congress back next year.  I like regular women, regular knives and common sense that favor Americans in combat.  It’s not complicated.  It shouldn’t be complicated.  Liberal philosophy that hurts Americans and helps its enemy’s is bullshit.  Obama really believes the anti-American crap his pals Bill Ayers and Rev. Jeremiah Wright were dishing out.  The proof’s in his actions.  They speak way louder than his words.”

Can't compete with Average

Can't compete with Average

Not everyone agrees with Shmo-Studd.  “Barack Obama is doing what’s right by leveling the playing field in the world and making the globe a better, fairer and more equitable place.  Soon America’s economy will be at a third world country level and it’ll be ruled by an old-school Latin American styled dictatorship.  This is outstanding,” said some anti-American asshole recently appointed to the Obama Justice Department — or maybe it was a new Supreme Court Justice, I forget, they all act the same.  “As someone a lot like a left-wing Latino woman I’d explain how this benefits all Americans, but you’re probably just some white guy, or know of one, so you couldn’t understand because you lack the intellectual capacity derived from the experience I have of just being me.  You poor dumb bastard.  You probably think individual freedom, personal responsibility and the U.S. Constitution are useful.  You’re way behind the eight ball.  Not even close.  I’d pity you but we liberal intellectuals don’t really give a shit about anyone but ourselves.  At least the enlightened ones don’t.”

Beheading in War like binge drinking in Kansas

Beheading in War like binge drinking in Kansas

The Weekly Standard reported that the Obama Justice Department has quietly ordered FBI agents to read Miranda rights to high value detainees captured and held at U.S. detention facilities in Afghanistan, according to a senior Republican on the House Intelligence Committee. “The administration has decided to change the focus to law enforcement. Here’s the problem. You have foreign fighters who are targeting US troops today — foreign fighters who go to another country to kill Americans. We capture them and they’re reading them their rights — Mirandizing these foreign fighters,” says Representative Mike Rogers, who recently met with military, intelligence and law enforcement officials on a fact-finding trip to Afghanistan. The FBI and Justice Department plan to significantly expand their role in global counter-terrorism operations, part of a U.S. policy shift that will replace a CIA-dominated system of clandestine detentions and interrogations with one built around transparent investigations and prosecutions.

Obama montageAmericans are familiar with the Miranda warning — so named because of the landmark 1966 Supreme Court case Miranda v. Arizona that required police officers and other law enforcement officials to advise suspected criminals of their rights: “You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to speak to an attorney, and to have an attorney present during any questioning. If you cannot afford a lawyer, one will be provided for you at government expense.” Republicans on Capitol Hill are not happy. “When they mirandize a suspect, the first thing they do is warn them that they have the ‘right to remain silent,'” says Representative Pete Hoekstra, the ranking Republican on the House Intelligence Committee. “It would seem the last thing we want is Khalid Sheikh Mohammed or any other al-Qaeda terrorist to remain silent. Our focus should be on preventing the next attack, not giving radical jihadists a new tactic to resist interrogation–lawyering up.”

Banned for your protection

Banned for your protection

WorldNet Daily reported that the U.S. Customs and Border Protection Agency is proposing a new definition that could be used to eliminate 8 of 10 legal pocketknives in the United States right now, according to activists who are gearing up to fight the plan. The federal bureaucracy is accepting comments – written only – that must be received by June 21 before its planned changes could become final, and Doug Ritter of KnifeRights.org, said the implications of the decision would be far-reaching, since many state and federal agencies depend on the agency’s definitions to determine what is legal in the United States. Ritter said the effect of the proposed change would be that the new design in knives, many of which contain a tiny spring to help the user pull open the blade and lock it into position, would be classified alongside those true weapons where the user just presses a button and the blade is ejected. “They are saying that any knife that you can open quickly or any knife that you can open with one hand is therefore a switchblade,” Ritter told WND. Ritter suggested that up to 80 percent of the pocketknives sold in America today either are one-handed opening knives or so-called assisted opening knives – and they all suddenly would be classified as illegal switchblades.

Regular gals kick Playboy's ass; no wonder Playboy's broke

Regular gals kick Playboy's ass; no wonder Playboy's broke

The Herald Sun reported that far from idolizing slender models, it seems gentlemen actually prefer Miss Average. It turns out that while women turn to plastic surgery or fad diets to get the “perfect” body of supermodels and centerfolds, men find the girl next door more appealing. Most attractive of all is Miss Average who stands at 163cm, with a 76cm waist and 102cm hips, a study found. Researchers asked 100 male students to rate the attractiveness of more than 200 drawings of female torsos of different sizes. They then compared those considered most attractive with the vital statistics of eight groups, including models, Playboy centerfolds and typical members of the population. The real women came closest to the ideal body shape identified in the first part of the study. And the most appealing measured equivalent to a size 14. Curvy women were also judged more appealing than either athletic types or long-legged, big-chested “Barbies”.

Drunk babes prep for Miranda rights

Drunk babes prep for Miranda rights

In other news, Metro reported Thursday that binge drinking used to affect men more frequently but now women are downing nearly as much alcohol. More than two-fifths of all 16 to 24-year-old women questioned in a study admitted going over recommended booze limits at least one day a week. “As a result, the number of young women drinking more than the recommended daily limit has now reached a similar level to that of young men,” according to the Office of National Statistics. No word on whether women who binge drink like pocketknives or if they prefer looking like the girl-next-door, but if they’re driving home drunk you can bet they know all about Miranda rights.  Or will real soon.

(C) 2009 InebriatedPress.com

Source articles:

Not Right
The Obama administration grants Miranda rights to detainees in Afghanistan.
http://www.weeklystandard.com/Content/Public/Articles/000/000/016/605iidws.asp

Obama move would eliminate 8 of 10 pocketknives
‘If this were to pass and you cross the state line with one, it’s a felony’
http://wnd.com/index.php?fa=PAGE.view&pageId=100679

Men reject centerfolds for Miss Average
Far from idolizing slender models, it seems gentlemen actually prefer Miss Average.
http://www.news.com.au/story/0,27574,25623858-36398,00.html

Female binge drinkers matching men
Binge drinking used to affect men more frequently but now women are downing nearly as much alcohol.
http://www.metro.co.uk/news/article.html?Female_binge_drinkers_matching_men&in_article_id=683888&in_page_id=34

Comments Off

Filed under Division of Rant (with Pretzels), Humor, IP News

Million Dollar Mattress, Hummingbird Sex, and Obama’s TARP Illusion

> Family tosses mattress housing $1 million cash stash
> G-Force’s during Hummingbird Sex would make Fighter Pilots Pass Out
> Obama’s TARP czar has no idea if it’s working, or where the money’s gone

Inebriated Press
June 12, 2009

Sex at the speed of a Hummingbird

Sex at the speed of a Hummingbird

AFP reported Thursday that a woman threw out her mothers’ old mattress not knowing it was stuffed with one million dollars.  And New Scientist reported Wednesday that during courtship-flights male hummingbirds sustain g-forces during acceleration that would cause a fighter jet pilot to pass out.  Meanwhile, The Weekly Standard reported Tuesday that Obama’s TARP oversight chair doesn’t know if it’s working, and doesn’t know where the money is going.  Vice President Joe Biden adds that “people are being scammed already” in the disbursement of $787 billion.  Some people say all’s fair in speed-sex and political-handouts.

A Happy Woman

A Happy Woman

“If you’re going for high-speed sex you have to expect to pass out now and then, it’s just a physical reality.  And if you’re going to jam though government spending plans so fast that no one reads the documentation or sets up a system of checks and balances, then you’re going to waste most of it, that’s just a bureaucratic reality,” said Happy Lucki-Thimaster, a sex worker and political analyst who built her trade during the Bill Clinton administration. “There’s nothing surprising or unusual about any of this.  And if you’re going to throw out other peoples mattresses without checking with them first, you may be tossing out something more valuable than you think.  But what the heck, all’s fair in fast sex, government mismanagement of your tax dollars, and lost fortunes in old bedding.  Shit happens and lots of times it’s purely predictable.  I can’t help but fantasize about having speed sex on a million dollar mattress bought with TARP funds.  It would be a real rush.  Makes me tingly just thinking about it.  Does it feel warm in here to you?”

Someone named Tricia

Someone named Tricia

Not everyone sees it the way Lucki-Thimaster does.  “Humming birds aren’t having high-speed sex; they’re just flapping their wings really fast, that’s all.  And Obama has his fingers on the pulse of everything and knows exactly what he’s doing and where all our money is going.  He said he’d go through the TARP thing and the budget line-by-line personally, and would account for every penny.  Trust him, he’s not just flapping his lips really fast,” said Tricia Kum-Lately, a circus manager and silicon investor, who often does Dallas just because.  “I had a million dollar mattress once but I quit hooking because it was bothering my back.  Now I work with circus clowns.  It’s remarkable how similar they are to the Democrat Congress and Obama administration — and I mean that in a positive way.  They could run the country just as well.  It gives me confidence that democracy works because it doesn’t take any brains or special training to run the world’s biggest economy.  Joe Biden is proof of that.  I’m so proud of this country.  In fact I think it’s the first time in my life that I’m really proud of America.  I guess I’ve got that in common with Michelle Obama.”

A surprising mattress

A surprising mattress

AFP reported that a stash of cash landed in the trash when a woman in Israel dumped her mother’s mattress not knowing it was stuffed with the equivalent of about one million dollars. Israeli media reported that the 40-year-old woman showed up at a garbage dump in a panic on Tuesday, looking for the valuable bedding. She had bought a new mattress for her mother and, wanting the gift to be a surprise, threw away the old one. She then found out the decades-old mattress contained her mother’s life savings. Workers are helping her search the garbage, but have found no sign of the cash so far.

Real hummingbird sex, or just faking it?

Real hummingbird sex, or just faking it?

New Scientist reported that male hummingbirds are breaking the speed record for love. During courtship flights, male Anna’s hummingbirds sustain accelerations that would cause a fighter jet pilot to pass out. Chris Clark, a biologist at the University of California at Berkeley, believes that the pressures of courtship push males to the limit of what is physically possible. Using high-speed video footage to study their flight, he has shown that, relative to their body size, male Anna’s hummingbirds are the fastest moving vertebrates. As they approach the ground, the hummingbirds spread their wings and tail, letting them pull them up into a skywards glide. At this stage, Clark calculated that their bodies undergo centripetal accelerations reaching 10 g – a force equivalent to 10 times the gravitational pull of Earth. Fighter jet pilots can pass out or temporarily lose their sight at accelerations above 7 g because their blood becomes unevenly distributed in their circulatory system.

We have no clue, but I wouldn't worry.

We have no clue, but I wouldn't worry.

The Weekly Standard reported that Obama’s transparency czar is using $84 million to build a web site that won’t be usable until October, and may not be useful until four years from now. Obama’s stimulus oversight guru, Joe Biden, says “people are being scammed already” in the disbursement of $787 billion. And, when asked whether TARP is working, Prof. Elizabeth Warren— head of the Congressionally formed oversight committee for that particular trillion-dollar project—says: “We can’t disclose what isn’t known. We’ve disclosed as much as we can, we’ve addressed this in our various reports. The Secretary of the Treasury says there are some positive indicators and there some negative indicators still in the economy. And that’s the best we can do.”  Aren’t giant, cumbersome government programs fun, especially now that the Obama administration’s cult of competence is in charge and offering unprecedented transparency and accountability?  When asked if she had a clear sense of what the overall TARP plan was and whether she was capable of summarizing what it’s supposed to be doing, she said: “No. And neither is Treasury. Treasury has given us multiple contradictory explanations for what it’s trying to accomplish.”

Fear not, for the wind and waves obey me

Fear not, for the wind and waves obey me

In other news, Associated Press reported Wednesday that the wind, a favorite power source of the green energy movement, seems to be dying down across the United States. And the cause, ironically, may be global warming – the very problem wind power seeks to address. The idea that winds may be slowing is still a speculative one, and scientists disagree whether that is happening. But a first-of-its-kind study suggests that average and peak wind speeds have been noticeably slowing since 1973, especially in the Midwest and the East. The study, which will be published in August in the peer-reviewed Journal of Geophysical Research, is preliminary, however, a couple of earlier studies also found wind reductions in Australia and Europe, offering more comfort that the U.S. findings are real. The new study “demonstrates, rather conclusively in my mind, that average and peak wind speeds have decreased over the U.S. in recent decades,” said Michael Mann, director of the Earth System Science Center at Penn State University.  No word on how the scientists feel about high-speed sex, million dollar mattresses or wasted TARP money, but you can bet they’re trying to harness the hot air pouring out of D.C. as a new energy source.  Or at least trying to get their piece of the federal budget so they can study it.

(C) 2009 InebriatedPress.com

Source articles:

Dumped mattress lands cash in trash in Israel
http://www.google.com/hostednews/afp/article/ALeqM5hvRwWnDjIUF3gNuTPVjHc7OPjTag

Male hummingbirds break speed record for love
http://www.newscientist.com/article/dn17277-male-hummingbirds-break-speed-record-for-love.html

video — http://brightcove.newscientist.com/services/player/bcpid1873822884?bctid=25816667001

TARP Oversight Chair Says She Doesn’t Know Whether It’s Working
http://www.weeklystandard.com/weblogs/TWSFP/2009/06/tarp_oversight_chair_says_she.asp

US Stimulus Fraud could hit $50B
http://macedoniaonline.eu/content/view/7101/52/

Not so windy: Research suggests winds dying down
http://hosted.ap.org/dynamic/stories/U/US_SCI_DIMINISHING_WINDS?SITE=PAPIT&SECTION=NATIONAL&TEMPLATE=DEFAULT

Comments Off

Filed under Humor, IP News